Drum Wars // a.i.

➳ eighteen

Jase

I didn't go to the garage.

I didn't feel like battling today.

I just wanted to be alone.

I left the house around two in the morning. Dad has been calling and calling, so has Ashton. I can tell they're worried.

I was sitting in my car in a vacant parking lot, sitting back and thinking. I want to know who I was as Margaret. I want to know who named me Margaret.

My phone rang again, and dad's name came up on the screen. I answered. "Jase! Thank god, where are you? Are you safe? What are you doing? I'll come pick you up." He babbled.

I felt tears come to my eyes. "Dad, I love you a lot. I don't know where this sudden feeling came from, but.... I want to find out more about myself."

"I don't understand. Please come home, Jase." Dad replied sadly. I sucked in a sharp breath, holding back tears. "I wanna know more." I said barely above a whisper.

"You've been my little girl since you were eight." I heard him say. Gosh, I couldn't believe I was doing this to him.

"I'll be home in two days." I said, wiping my eyes. Dad sighed, saying, "okay. I'll let you find your way. Please.... Just be careful."

I hiccuped, then said sadly, "I love you, dad." On the other line I heard dad sniffle, and that hurt even more. "I love you too, kiddo."

This had nothing to do with Ashton anymore. I've come to the realization that after three and a half months of drumming and talking to this kid, I'm in love. But I couldn't be. Not over so little time.

I forced myself to believe that things didn't work that way.

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I'm wearing my dads hat and I haven't taken it off bc I feel so cool lawlz - Nina