Imperfect (Bucky x Reader x Loki)

Peace

  Warning: Near death experience, Sedation

Just keep running.

You didn't know where you were going. All you knew was that you had to keep running as far as you could. If you could still hear that alarm going off then you were not far enough away. Your feet hit the dirt hard as you dodged trees left and right getting deeper into the woods. You didn't even spare a single glance behind you for fear you would see them on your tail or that that single glance could cause you to lose even a single second in this chase.

If you weren't on the run, you would have taken a second to appreciate the sun rays on your skin and the breeze blowing through your hair and into your lungs. That intoxicating sweet woodsy smell that hit your nose with each intake of oxygen. Reminding you of your first mission you had went on with the Soldier. But time wasn't a luxury you had when you were trying to make an escape.

Before you knew it, you had come to a sudden halt right at the edge of a cliff as you emerged from the woods.

"Fuck." you screamed. You looked side to side with your mind going a million miles per hour. Panic was starting to set in, your heart rate started to pick up even more than when you were running. There was no where to go. There was nothing but cliff and ocean for as far as you could see.

If you jumped there was no where for you to swim to. If you stayed, they would just drag your ass back and you already knew what was waiting for you at the base. You would be gone again. Sedated all the time and then who knows what else they would plan for you. Maybe if you just... turn back and run in another direction. Any direction that wasn't to them. Screw them for moving you to a completely new facility. You had just finally gotten to know the old facility like the back of your hand.

"Don't even think about it. There's nowhere for you to go if you jump other than maybe the bottom of the ocean. It's too late."

The annoying familiar deep male voice made you freeze and stiffen. You could hear the sound of several weapons clicking.

You bit your lip as you closed your eyes. You slowly opened your eyes and looked out to the orange and red horizon. Finally allowing yourself to take in the breeze and enjoy the sun on your skin. It's warmth inviting compared to the cold blow of the wind. This would probably be the last time you felt it. Whether you jumped and returned with them. You slowly raised your hands and turned around looking at roughly ten or more men in tactical gear pointing their weapons right at you.

"Come on and be a good girl. Don't make us fire." Brock Rumlow stepped forward as he spoke.

"You wouldn't." You rolled your eyes. You knew you were being a little cocky but you also knew that they needed you.

"You don't know that." he smirked only causing you to roll your eyes again.

"Don't make this anymore difficult than it has to be, y/n."

"When do I ever make things difficult, Rumlow." You gave him the most innocent smile you could produce which caused him to roll his eyes and scoff this time.

He showed you the gun in his hand and steadily placed it back in its holster on his thigh. He slowly lifted his hands as though that was supposed to make you feel any better. "Back we go. I promise it won't hurt too much." he held his right hand out to you. You looked at him then his hand then the rest of the team. He motioned with his left hand for them to lower their weapons. They did although it was obviously unwillingly.

It won't hurt too much.

Those words echoed in your mind causing your breathing and heart rate that had only just calmed to pick back up. They always said it wasn't going to hurt too much. Of course that was always a straight fucking lie. The poking, prodding and experimentations.

You took a step back towards the edge of the cliff. Debris kicking off the side and into the cold dark waiting water below.

Rumlow took a step forward. Holding his hand out a little more impatiently and worriedly but you knew that the only worry he was feeling right now was for his own being if he did fail on bringing you back to Pierce.

You stood your ground trying to make a decision. Was possibly dying better than the idea of returning with him.

"Where is he?" You asked your voice almost cracking.

"He's on a mission. Don't you want to be around when he gets back?"

"That's one hell of a long mission." Now you were the one starting to feel annoyed.

"Don't get all witchy on me, Y/n." He warned looking from your eyes to your hands.

You looked down at your hands as they began to glow blue and swirl with energy around your palm and fingertips. Usually you had your magic under control, but right now being out of control of the situation was overwhelming.

"Now."

You looked up from your hands shaking your head ready to make a move, but it was too late. You felt a sharp pain in your right arm. You could feel your magic slipping away just like your consciousness. You gingerly pulled the dart out of your arm and threw it to the ground. You could already begin to feel the affects of the sedative. Everything started to look fuzzy and your thoughts started to slow down. You guessed they learned their lesson and upped the dosage.

What had the Winter Soldier told you to never do? Hesitate. What did you just do...? Hesitate, because you let your feelings take control and distract you.

"Guess this... it." You mumbled or at least tried to mumble. You weren't actually sure if the words had even left your lips coherently because the next thing you knew you were falling backwards. The air rushed past you, cold and biting. Your hair blowing upwards obscuring your vision even more.

Yes. This was better than going back. You didn't want to be used in the ways they wanted to use you anymore. You wondered if at this moment you should be having a flash of memories. Like the stories of people having a near death experience. Moments and memories flashing before their eyes. Not you, though. They had taken that away from you a long time ago. You could remember tiny bits and pieces, but you also weren't sure if they were real or if you had just made it up to cope. You did at least have your most recent memories with the Soldier. All those missions together that always lead to long nights of sex. Always fearing that your relationship would be discovered, but that never stopped either of you.

"I wonder if dying hurts." You thought to yourself just as you felt yourself collide with the surface of the water and under you went. The sedative was starting to really kick in, and you almost felt yourself at peace for the first time in a long time. The only thing that flashed through your mind was a pair of blue eyes before your own (e/c) finally closed.

"No I don't think it does."