Just Another Girl (Niall Horan A.U. fanfiction)

Epilogue

College Graduation - 3 Years Later

I toss my cap into the air with everyone else, elated to be graduating college. It's been a long four years and I'm ready to set out on my own but at the same time, I'll miss college. Maybe I don't need to worry about grades anymore, but I do need to worry about finding a job, a place to live, my pay...

"Haven't even been a college graduate for two seconds and you're already moving on to new worries, I see." Julie's voice says from behind me. I laugh as I turn to face her.

"Was it really that obvious?" I ask her.

She just nods and then wraps her arms around me in a hug. I hug her back and we squeal uncharacteristically. It just feels so great to be a college graduate.

I see Katie and Louis making their way over and I run towards them. "We made it!" I yell, wrapping my arms around them both. I can hear them laughing as we all hug. We all break away and Louis lifts Katie up in a very passionate kiss. I look away, stifling my laughter and in that moment our eyes meet. In the three years since we last spoke, nothing has changed. My heart still flutters whenever I see him and I still get that warm feeling whenever we happen to make eye contact.

Niall holds my gaze until we've been staring for too long before looking away. The electricity disappears and the warm feeling fades until it's the same ache I've been feeling for three years, right in the center of my chest. I see Katie glancing between us and I know the staring did not go unseen. She gives me a small smile, like she's saying go on!

I know I shouldn't. But it's college graduation, we'll be going our separate ways after today. A little conversation can't hurt, right?

I know I'm wrong, I'm just trying to convince myself that I'm doing the right thing in coming towards him, but I can't just leave without saying another word to him ever again. He sees me coming and his eyes widen almost imperceptibly - but I notice. I give him a shy smile to let him know I'm not coming to shout at him for something but he still looks nervous.

It seems like forever, but finally I'm standing in front of him. We carefully avoid each other's eyes. The awkwardness between us is so strong, I wish immediately that I hadn't come over. But there's no going back now.

"Hey Emily," he says, sounding confused and shy.

"Hey, I just wanted to say...congratulations." I say, making something up. I can't tell him I came over because I felt this irresistible force pulling me towards him. That would be weird. And he probably already thinks I'm weird enough.

"You too," he says, smiling at me. It almost looks natural.

This is painfully awkward, I should have known this was a bad idea. "Well, bye." I squeak, my cheeks burning, feeling more embarrassed than I ever have.

"Emily wait!" he calls as I'm walking away. I turn around - probably too fast.

"Yes?"

"I...I've stopped drinking." he looks away from me again as his cheeks redden. I don't say anything. He stopped drinking? For me? No, he didn't say that...but the warm feeling is starting to come back and I can't shut it off.

"You did?" I finally ask. He just nods quietly, still looking at the ground. "Why? Why'd you stop?"

He finally looks up at me and I almost take a step back; the emotion behind his eyes is so strong, so full of pain that I want to reach out and hug him. But I don't.

"What I did that night...it was without a doubt the worst thing I've ever done. It doesn't matter that I was drunk, no one should lose control like I did. And nobody should put such an innocent, perfect girl like you in a situation like that." he says the last part quietly and my cheeks flush. "I hated myself after that night, probably more than you hated me. I knew I couldn't let myself drink anymore. I guess I thought that doing something as simple as that would be enough to win you back." he glances at me and I look away quickly. "I know now that things aren't that simple. I don't deserve you, but I didn't realize it at the time. I'm just glad you did." He stands there quietly, waiting for me to respond.