Killing Swans

Chapter 36 - Return to Hell

Milo's PoV

"Ok so you said somewhere in Europe would be a nice place to live and I agree, but do you want a rather warm climate or a cold one?" I asked, sitting in front of my laptop at the dining table while Henry sat on the couch next to Strudels, petting him and eating a bowl of soup that I had made him. Henry was very thin, and I am not complaining, I would never ever body-shame anybody, that is just so fucking tasteless, but I knew it was because he had a hard time and probably didn't get to eat a lot when Josh would...when he would hurt him, so I was trying to nurse him back to health as best as I could. 

Henry looked up as he was blowing on the spoon in front of his mouth, before he answered "I don't know, what would you like?" He seemed to be a little indifferent about the whole us running away or at least him running away, letting me deal with Josh and then hopefully come after him thing. I mean he wanted to flee, I know that, but I think to some extend he still didn't believe that it would work this time, after he had failed once before. He lost hope, but I would make sure that he would get away from Josh safely, even if it would cost me my health, everything that I owned and maybe...yes maybe just my life. I needed Henry to be safe again and so he should believe me when I said, that I would make this attempt to run away succeed, no matter the cost. 

"I don't know, I like both. So what about you? Do you have a city or a country in mind that you always wanted to visit or maybe even live in?" I asked in a clever attempt to turn the question around, so now he really had to answer honestly without trying to keep my feelings in mind. Honestly I was fine wherever, as long as Henry would be next to me. He slurped on his soup a little, thinking about it before he said a little shyly "I don't know, it's pretty basic but I-...I always wanted to go to Italy. Maybe Call me by your name did that for me, but I would love to spend my days in a small old house, making pasta and love while drinking wine...that would be a nice dream, but I don't know, whatever you like." 

I had to smile at him when I heard that. Henry did have dreams outside of ballet, he wanted to live and maybe I had something to do with that, maybe me supporting him, helped him, even allowing him to imagine a life outside his prison, but I don't know, it was just beautiful to hear. And did I want to experience something like that with Henry? Yes, absolutely. But I also loved him so very much, that even if he were to live through this fantasy with somebody else, who would treat him right, I would still be happy. I just wanted to see him happy, you know? 

"That sounds amazing...then let's do Italy! I don't know my way around there, so I don't really know what places would be best, but I will do a bit of research and I think we can try to get you away from here after the premiere! I know you said you wanted to dance that one and I understand that, so I will respect your wishes. The rest you can leave up to me, I will plan the whole thing and how I will keep Josh away from you before I will come after you...what do you think?" I asked, my heart beating a little faster at the prospect of soon living a life with Henry, who would not have to live in fear and pain every day. I mean he would still need a lot of time and space to heal, but at least he was away from Josh. 

"I think it sounds amazing...just like a dream" Henry said and I smiled, closing my laptop and walking over to him. Henry had now stayed with me for two days, but he wanted to return home tomorrow, which I did not like, at all, but he said Josh would come for him sooner or later anyway, he would rather return without having to fight him immediately and I understood that, though in my opinion, Josh could threaten my life and I would not let him take Henry again. But we just had to sit this one out for two more weeks and then Henry could be free...I sat down beside him and said "It soon won't be a dream anymore." 

Henry grinned a big smile at that, before he put down his empty bowl, cuddling up to me and my heart was always beating a little faster when I got to hold Henry. He laid a hand on my chest as he rested his head on my shoulder and Strudels was not pleased, so he just walked away, like the arrogant cute little ball of fluff that he was, leaving me alone with Henry, who was now looking up at me. He seemed so calm, like he either just knew that my plan was going to work or that he knew that it wouldn't and he had already made peace with that, but I really hoped for it to be the first one, because I would try everything that I could to make that happen.