thirty-four: hiatus

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                              20 something by sza

Imogen.

6 Months Later

"Thanks for everything Mommy" I hugged her

"Imogen of course, that's what I'm here for", She pulled away and placed her palms on my cheeks

"You're gonna be great. I love you, and you know you can always come home" She said

"I know, just nervous" I said

"Immy, it's been so great having you home. But you belong out there, and you know that" Roxie said

I smiled, "Come here" I opened my arms for my sister

I held her in my embrace and a tear fell down my face. I'd been home for about 6 months, away from the spotlight. I did small jobs here and there and appeared in brand ads but I haven't made any public appearances since Paris. I was going back home to the city, just in time for Dominiques gala.

When I first got home, I was broken and didn't feel like going out. I locked myself away for 3 days but my mother has been here for me every step of the way. I've gone to therapy, I've gotten happier, but I did miss the fast paced life. I had a breakthrough last week with my therapist and she thought I was ready to go back to work.

"Okay guys, I'll see you later"  I waved before walking towards the car I called for me.

During my time in Detroit, I had to face everything I had suppressed. It took me months to even talk about or even say Maxime's name. For the first couple weeks, I cried over him and I didn't even read his letter until I got off the couch. I couldn't bring myself to call him, I changed my number to get a fresh start but I never lost his. Yasmin and I talked about it over our daily facetime sessions. I'd be lying if I said I didn't look him up every now and then.

Dominique was having a gala for the 47th anniversary of Zenith. It would be my first public appearance since Paris, and I was nervous. I was moving in with Yasmin and Antoinette— yes they got back together and Antoinette moved to New York— only until I could find a house of my own.

I handed the ticket in at the counter and boarded the plane. I put my carry on up and sat down, looking out the window. The pilot spoke and the plane started to ascend. Flight attendants came by and took everyone's order, I got a ginger ale and some crackers. I put my headphones in and opened my Jane Austen book, 'Emma'.
—————

The flight was short, and Yasminette (Yas and Antoinette) picked me up from the airport. I sat in the backseat as we drove back to the apartment. I looked out the window, observing the fast paced city I'd left behind.

I thought to myself how great of an opportunity this was. I didn't know whether I'd have come back if not for this event. It was the push I needed, it felt like a step in the right direction.

"What're you wearing tonight babe?" Yasmin turned around to look at me

"I ordered a custom dress, nothing too special" I responded m

"You know of this is too much, we can all sit this one out" Antoinette said looking at me in the rear view

"No, I'm ready" I nodded, "And besides it wouldn't be a party without moi" I said

"There she is!!" Yasmin smiled

We pulled into the apartment garage and I got out, taking a deep breath. It felt good to be home, I was happy and ready to live my life. We walked into the house and I opened the fridge to get a bottle of water. I walked up to the window and took a sip. I smiled at the view in front of me.

"Okay so the glam team will be here in 3 hours, what do you want to do until then?" Yasmin asked

I turned around, "You wanna go grocery shopping?" I chimed, I don't know why but something about grocery shopping made me feel happy

"Ooh can we stop by that sex shop down the street too?" She beamed, I laughed and walked towards my room.
—————

I brought my dress out of the garment steamer and slipped it on. Mark and Sophie did the final touches on my hair and makeup. Sophie finished straightening my layered 30 inch hair, as I sat down. We all got ready in the huge bathroom, with Ariana Grande's 'Monopoly' playing on the speaker. I danced in the mirror as they told me to hold still, eventually they started to dance too.

Yasmin walked in, wearing a beautiful Vivian Westwood long black velvet skintight gown. She started singing and bent over to shake her ass. We all cheered her on and I sang, smacking her as she danced. She stood and we went back and fourth singing our favorite part of our song.

"This been buildin' up, I guess this friendship like Home Depot. I'm so thankful working with my best friend, she the cheat code" We screamed

She tried to whistle tone and I stopped her as she horribly failed. I fixed my hair and she looked at me with a strange look on her face.

"What?" I asked

"Bitch, 'nothing too special?' You look smoking" She screamed

"Look at you, miss snatched. I love what you've done with that dress" I said

I turned around so that Sophie and Mark could put the finishing touches on my dress, "Okay the car is here, and Antoinette is waiting in the lobby, let's go" Yasmin said

"Wait, just one last....touch" Sophie said

I slipped on my heels and started towards the door

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I slipped on my heels and started towards the door. Yasmin and I locked arms heading down to the lobby. I was nervous but I had to do this. We met Antoinette in the lobby, who whistled at our arrival. Our security detail stood at the building entrance.

"You look amazing Imogen" She said

"Thank you, I love your pantsuit, c'est chic" I said

She turned to Yasmin who stood by her, giving her a kiss, "Babe you look so gorgeous in that dress. I cant wait to take it off of you tonight" Antoinette said as we started to walk to the car.

I rolled my eyes as Yasmin purred at her comment. We got in the backseat, greeting our security for the night. As the car pulled off, a wave of nerves consumed me. I kept my composure and texted my therapist. Dr. Patty and I agreed to keep in touch because her and I had a connection that I didn't want to find somewhere else.

The traffic grew as everyone was exiting onto the red carpet. I looked out the window and was met with the flashing lights. My phone vibrated and I checked to see the message.

DP: Trust yourself I. Ask yourself how much of yourself you're willing to give. And remember these people do not have the right to have unlimited access to you.

I nodded and took a deep breath, the car parked and my security detail came around to open the door. I stepped out and walked towards the carpet.

Lights, Camera, Maxime?
*******

My life is in shambles rn lol

Make predictions I guess

Love u, always !!

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