Bullied // a.i.

Chapter Ten

(there is a trigger warning in this chapter, if you're sensitive to cutting/suicidal thoughts, I advise you not to read this chapter)

"Ashton, you're partnered with Zoey."

Are you fucking kidding me. Out of all people, why him. This is just fucking great.

"This project is one of those where you'll have to work on it in class and after school. You can sit with your partner and I'll come over to you both and discuss what is expected for this project." The teacher explained. I look over at Ashton to see which one of us is moving. I'm guessing Ashton is coming over to my table, considering he is gathering his bag. He walked the short distance to my table and aggressively sat himself down in the chair.

He was silent, until he said, "I didn't know you listened to Bring Me The Horizon."

I glanced down at my shirt, then said "Oh, uh yeah. I really enjoy their music."

He simply nodded and eyed my bracelet. "You watch Supernatural?"

"Yeah, it's my favorite show." I replied.

"It's mine, too." It's making me uncomfortable knowing that Ashton and I have the same favorite show and like similar music. Like, someone that has always been extremely rude to me has the same interests. It bothers me emensley.

By now, it was just an awkward silence between Ashton and me. The teacher, thankfully, came over to us to talk about the project.

"Now, I know you two don't get along. I was hoping that assigning you guys to work together would resolve some problems." The teacher started. He then explained the project to us. Basically, we have come up with a plan to help the world with a current issue. It has to be something that we can implement. So, if we were to want to send water over to Africa, we would have to find a way to actually do it. "By next week, I would like to know what your guys plan is. Sound good?" he asked and we both nodded.

By then, the teacher left and Ashton and I were silent. That is, until he spoke. "So, what do you want to do for the project?"

"I don't know.. I was thinking about helping out orphanages, maybe?" I replied.

"Or, we could do something with single parents who are struggling." That took me aback. Does he want to do this because my mom is a single parent or?

"Oh, yeah. That's a great idea." I say. "Where do you want to meet? One of our houses, or at the library or something?"

"I hate the library. Let's just be at one of our houses." He says. "I don't know why you're planning this now. We don't have to meet after school for awhile."

"I like things to be planned out."

"Okay." He sounds aggravated now. I don't know why. I didn't say anything that'd make him angry.

We sat in silence until the teacher said that we could put our things away. "You should have decided what you're going to do. If not, then you get until tomorrow to decide." He says. "I hope you enjoy doing this project."

I know it sounds dumb, but I hope so too.

-:-

(trigger warning)

My day was going pretty great until lunch. Ashton and his friends were tormenting me, saying things like "slit your wrists", "drink bleach", "slit your throat before I do", "you're fucking fat stop eating", and more.

I don't know why, but it really got to me today. It usually doesn't. But when it does, I resort to self destruction.

I go to my dresser, which is where I hide my blades and razors. I hold the blade in my fingers and think about how long I've been clean. It's been about a month now. Is it worth losing my month over this?

Yes. I deserve everything I do to myself, and what Ashton does to me.

I hold the blade up to my wrist and make five cuts. That five turned into ten. Then fifteen. Self harm is an addicting thing. Once I make one cut, I can't stop.

The only reason I stopped now was because I was crying and my tears were falling on my arm. Now that I've stopped, I've realized I've made a dumb mistake. Which makes me hate myself even more.

I quickly run to the bathroom so Ty won't see me. In here, I clean up my arm and try to stop the bleeding.

I finally get cleaned up and head back to my room. In my room, I change into a sweatshirt, first, so that I'm covered up. Then I hide the blades again.

After everything's cleaned up, I grab a book off my nightstand and read to distract myself the rest of the night. I hope reading is effective by the time I go to sleep, because I'm afraid I'm going to do more damage.

-:-

A/N

yoo I updated in less than a months time bless.

oh and sorry this chapter kinda got dark at the end.

I really don't know what to talk about in this authors note so bye I guess

oh QOTC: what's your favorite book right now?

mine's the perks of being a wallflower bc it's amazing

okay bye i love you 💜

-Abigail