Seeking Solace

Chapter 9

Suibian returned from making sure the children were settled, and sat next to Yanling Daoren close enough that their shoulders brushed, a silent form of comfort, letting him know he was there. Yanling Daoren relaxed slightly and the atmosphere in the room seemed to lighten. 

Yanling Daoren nodded, satisfied the kids were returned safely and feeling slightly at ease with Suibian by his side again. "Good." 

"Um…" A sheepish voice started, the person raised their hand, looking awkward. He was a young man, probably mid or late twenties, from the Lan sect. Lan Qiren and Lan Xichen both looked at him.

Yanling Daoren arched a brow. 

"I was just wondering.. s-s-since we saw your… memories… if Suibian is like you?" 

"Then ask him, not me." Yanling Daoren gave the boy an incredulous look. Suibian laughed. 

"You want to know about me? Whether I have past memories or not?" 

The young man paused for a moment before slowly nodding.

Suibian rolled his eyes and sighed. "Fine. I'll tell you. Long ago, sometime after Daoren's death, I was a general, who was from a well off family and I had one older brother. I had a pretty good childhood until I hit my late twenties and became an adult. My parents died.

“I became a general at 23, which was rare. I led my soldiers to victory a good number of times. I had a wife as well who was with a child before the last time I went off to fight. Too late, I realized I had fallen into a trap set by my own brother who betrayed me, my flesh and blood. All my comrades, my soldiers were slaughtered.

“As for me, I was taken captive and tortured at my own brother's orders. He came to gloat and tell me that he poisoned and killed our parents and that as soon I left my wife to go to war…" 

The muscles in Suibian's jaw ticked with his rising anger and he clenched his fists, "He raped my pregnant wife and then killed her and my unborn child afterwards. He showed me a box with bits and pieces of their corpses as a gift. He laughed and spat in my face. My body was in ruins..."

Suibian's eyes were distant and recalled his past and told them the details. 

"He had me brutally whipped, leaving my flesh marked with whip lashes on my back that oozed blood. Some of my fingers had been chopped off. One of my eyes had been gouged out and my tongue cut from my mouth. I managed to snap my wrists so I could maneuver myself from my restraints around my wrists and snatch a blade from one of the guards between my teeth to slit my brother's throat before driving it into his heart for good measure.  I was stabbed afterward by multiple swords and died. But I died with the satisfaction of knowing he died with me." He finished with a cruel smile, his arms crossed as he looked at the young man who'd gone green in the face.