Seeking Solace

Chapter 16

Lan Xuan activated the talisman, sending out a gentle white blue mist to help distribute the energy of the talisman until one by one, all the others in the room gradually succumbed to it, losing consciousness. 

Afterwards, he made quick work to make sure his family would at least be comfortable during this process, laying them all on their backs carefully and putting cushions under their heads. 

Wei Wuxian came forward, eyes flickering to each person, lingering on Jiang Cheng and then Lan Wangji. He looked worried. Lan Xuan's heart went out to him, even after everything, after what Jiang Cheng did, or more like what he didn't do, and even believing his brother hated him, Wei Wuxian still cared and worried about them. 

Wei Wuxian's eyes widened. "Xiao Xingchen, my mother's elder martial brother, and Song Lan are here too. I can't recall if you mentioned them to me," Wei Wuxian spoke to Yanling Daoren. 

"Hmm, I don't recall either. A lot has been going on and I've been focused on these matters," Yanling Daoren gestured to the other cultivators laid out on the ground. 

"The Nie Brothers too. Nie Huaisang is alright, and I'd say Nie Mingjue is a good man." Wei Wuxian murmured. Suibian snorted, rolling his eyes which made Yanling Daoren give him the look. Suibian grinned, wiggling his eyebrows, inching closer, causing Yanling Daoren to become flustered, and stumbling back a little, and pretending nothing happened. 

"Look, I'm not going to disagree, Nie Mingjue is a courageous, righteous kind of man, but his family has its own history of develing in resentful energy, and their sabers slowly make them go crazy with berserk type of rage and eventually Qi Deviation, generally all dying young. 

  And good man, righteous man, or not, like all rest in this room, save for very few, fell for the lies and rumors and gossip, and saw what they wanted to see and believed a lying manwhore and his asshole bastard son. It pains me to say that I am related to them. Maybe it's not too late for Jin Guangyao to see the light, but he will not get off lightly. His father, however, really needs to go." Suibian grumbled. 

Wei Wuxian turned to Lan Xuan, "So is it happening now?"

Lan Xuan nodded. "Yes, as the one who activated the talisman, my energy, my power is connected to it and it's working as it should. As of right now, I started them off at the very beginning of your memories, which they already saw, however, but instead of feeling everything you felt, or reading your thoughts, they are living through these moments, your memories as if it's happening to them, whatever they are thinking and feeling, is their own. I am forcing them to see themselves in a different light, as if they had been in your place from the very start, as though they lived through it, instead of you. 

   Right now, they are deep under, so to them it's all very real, and is happening to them. It's a lot like empathy, with some differences. Empathy is potentially more dangerous, but this however, I'd say is a safer method that works on a larger scale. Though this method could be equally as dangerous if you don't know what you're doing and you're not careful." Lan Xuan explained, even knowing Wei Wuxian knew that. 

"If you still see it as a problem, we can stop now and I can pull them out," Lan Xuan spoke to Wei Wuxian. 

Wei Wuxian shook his head. "No, no. I-" he paused to chew on his lip,"It's not the same. They're still seeing my memories, I know that, but it's different if it's centered around them, and it's centered on me, they aren't able to see my thoughts, feel my feelings as if they're their own. I understand what you're saying. If such a thing as swapping lives and experiences were possible, I'd wish that on no one. 

   But at the same time, I want them to know what they have done, for it to fully sink in and realize the gravity of their own words and actions, when all they focused on was mine, condemned me from the start without a second thought. I never wanted to come back, even when they kept calling from me, fearing I would no doubt come back for revenge. But that's not the kind of man I am. And I've been down that road once with Wen Chao, I won't say I regret, because I don't, but I didn't have to take it as far as I did. I've never claimed to be perfect. I just wanted to do what I thought was right. And I failed all the same. Jiang Cheng always warned me about the hero complex that I apparently have, which I suppose makes me a fool with a bleeding heart. "Wei Wuxian murmured.