Electric / Steve Rogers x OC x Bucky Barnes ✓

Chapter 128: Limbo

BUCKY

I watch Shuri as she taps on her tablet. She turns to look at Maddie, "I'm not sure yet. I recognize some of this, it reminds me a lot of Bucky, but it's a little different." 

I sigh deeply. Of course it is. 

When they fucked with her brain it was years after they first did it to mine. They've probably perfected that method, worked on it over and over until it was almost fool-proof. 

"Does that mean you can't fix me?" I hear Madeline ask weakly and I turn to look at her. I see tears gleaming in her eyes and it makes my heart hurt. 

Shuri flashes her a smile, "Of course I can fix you. It just might take me a bit longer to figure out than I thought it would." 

Madeline sighs and her eyes meet mine. I take her hand, "You will be okay, doll. It's all going to be fine." 

I glance at Steve and I see the worried expression on his face. 

"What was she doing when it happened?" I ask him in a low voice. I don't want Madeline to strain herself and she might not remember. 

He looks at me guiltily. 

I sigh deeply again before I whisper, "Really Steve? You were fighting? Again?" 

His jaw clenches, "We weren't fighting. But we were talking about some emotional things." 

I glance at Maddie but her gaze is fixed on her hand resting in mine. I caress it with my thumb, trying to soothe her. 

"What kind of things?" I ask Steve as I turn back to him, watching his expression carefully. 

He looks like he's in pain as he meets my eyes. Something big, then. 

"What situations has she generally been in when this happens?" Shuri asks, interrupting the quiet conversation I'm having with Steve right now. 

I turn to look at her, "What do you mean?" 

"Like her emotional state. What's it been like? Is there a common factor, is there certain situations she's in when she hears the voice? Like using her powers, on missions, stressful situations?" 

I turn my gaze to Maddie. There has been a common factor every single time. 

"It happens when we talk about the future," Madeline quickly says. She's not looking at either of us, her gaze fixed on Shuri, "It happens when we fight or when I have to think about the future or my emotions." 

Shuri nods but doesn't say a word, she just continues tapping on the tablet in her hand. 

"What does it mean?" Madeline asks and I watch her face but she doesn't meet my eyes. 

"I'm not sure yet.. Has it ever happened while on a mission?" 

"No." 

"Has it ever happened while using your powers?" 

"No," Madeline replies again. 

"So only when you're going through emotional stress, then?" 

Madeline nods slightly, her eyes going back to our joined hands. 

Shuri looks between me and Steve, "Could I have a moment with Madeline alone, please?" 

I meet Steve's eyes and we're both hesitating for a second but decide to get up. I kiss Madelines cheek before I leave her side, "We'll be right outside." 

She nods quickly and we leave the lab. 

Once we're outside the door I turn to Steve, "What happened?" 

He sighs, "We were talking about.. everything, again." 

I roll my eyes at him, "Why would you bring that up again?" 

"I didn't, she did.. Well, I guess we both did." 

"Do you not realize you should have waited to have that conversation until we know what's going on with her? You know that shit triggers her, it was pretty obvious after last time." 

"I know Buck but we have to deal with it, somehow. Right now we're all in limbo, ignoring the truth about what's going on." 

"What do you mean? What the hell did she say to you?" 

I see the sadness in his eyes when he speaks, "She questioned how I felt about her. She brought up Peggy. She questioned this entire situation, Buck. She said she was afraid we were expecting more from her than she could give us. She said she wasn't sure about the future." 

"What do you mean?" I ask again. 

"You know, what we've been talking about. Her leaving on missions, staying safe. What it's going to be like. She said she's afraid we're expecting her to have our children and then stay at home while we go out and risk our lives. And then.." He hesitates and the pain is still etched onto his face. 

I can tell he's distraught, I can tell that whatever happened between them was not just a random conversation, or a game to see who could stay stubborn the longest, like last time. 

I can tell he's serious, I can tell he feels hurt and conflicted. 

I sigh, "Steve, please just say it. I need to know." 

"She said she wasn't sure she was the one for me." 

I widen my eyes at him, "What?! Why would she say that?" 

"Because she doesn't think she can give us - me - what I want. What I'm looking for. That's why she brought up Peggy." 

"And what did you say to her? Do you have doubts?" 

"No!" He quickly exclaims, "And I told her that. I told her she is the one. But then she brought up the compass, she brought up that I bring it with me everywhere. And that she knew it held a picture of Peggy inside. So I showed her what was actually inside, that it's a picture of her, that it's been her since the day I met her. I made it clear that Peggy isn't the one for me, that she never was. And then I asked her if I was the one for her." 

My chest tightens at his words. I feel panic rumbling through my veins. 

Does Madeline think he's the one? Where does that leave me?

"What did she say?" 

"Nothing," he replies quietly, "That's when the panic attack hit."