Tell Me With Flowers

9. Ice museum

MEGAN

"I heard the date went well." Amber said, plopping down in front of our PC, doing our finances as I sat across her. Her eyes darted towards me in sheer excitement that I had never seen in her before, especially for me.

When I had been dating Peter, she never took an opportunity to ask if I had a good time with him. She hated him for his guts and that was the end of it. But with Miles, it was as if she was approving me to date him if I was to take whatever this was further.

"Tell me, Meg!" She turned to face me completely when I didn't say a word back to her. "Where did he take you?"

"We went to his restaurant." I finally found my voice, telling her the details. "He took me back into the kitchen and we had macaroni and cheese in his bunker room."

"Hmm, a guy who takes a girl to his own restaurant for date and feeds her macaroni and cheese." She put her forefinger on her chin contemplating what I said. "For a guy with heaps of money, he sure saves a lot."

I laughed at that. "No, it was nice. He let me have some red wine. We talked a little, well we mostly bantered, but it was good."

"Ah, the way your cheeks light up when I say his name tells it all." Amber crossed her right leg over her left and turned back to the work, while I tried to calm down my cheeks. The amused glint in her face didn't die down even when I denied her words. "It's okay Meg, it's the same way for me with Zack."

"Zack and you know each other for long." I pouted at her. "While I have met Miles for only two times."

Amber looked at me as if I was another dumb girl. "Haven't you seen enough movies? It all takes one glace, one smile and one gesture."

"But this is not a movie." I struggled with my words. I had been proved time and again that I wasn't worth the good things. And every time something good happened, I had to do my best to keep my mind open for my own doom.

"We can talk about the heavy stuffs after another few dates." Amber consoled patting my back as I put my head on the slab, wondering what was happening in my life. "Did you two kiss?"

"No." I turned my head at her from the slab. "Though it wasn't planned, the date was romantic. He even laughed at all of my stupid jokes. As he dropped me home, I saw him leaning down for a kiss."

I closed my eyes, remembering the way he looked at me. I felt like I was the only person he cared about. But my previous insecurities came bouncing off. What if he kissed me and realized that I wasn't worth all the calls he had made?

He had treated me with more gentleness and concern than anyone ever had. Like I was a porcelain doll that would break if he took one misstep. And for that moment, I felt like I had everything I dreamed of. I didn't want a kiss to ruin that feeling for me. In all honesty, I wanted that blissful moment to last as long as it could.

So, instead of leaning in, I did what I thought was best.

"What happened, Megan?" Amber's attention was fully on me now.

"I kissed his cheek before things escalated." I muttered, hoping that I hadn't offended him. He had looked at me in shock as if he wasn't anticipating this move from me and then slowly, he broke into a smirk. I could only wish that I hadn't scratched the tiny patch we had made in his car before the date.

In reality, I regretted it and I knew he would never call me back thinking how much of a klutz I was. He had a lot of girls at his disposal, wanting to do what he wanted them to do, and I wasn't one of them. I wasn't worth it all. It was something I had come to accept.