Chapter 22- I Can Explain

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Lou

I was so excited to bring her to my town house. It was far, but I don't think Y/N minded the drive. I wanted to invite her into a part of my life that was a secret to most. I could see that she liked it, my spontaneity and it made me feel good that she was looking forward to our time together as much as I was.

Something about her made my confident and cocky exterior break off and feel nervous like a high school crush. She was a stream of fresh water that was good for me.

I made sure to take her to my favorite spots like the Diner for lunch the first day and the cafe that I always liked to visit when I was here.

Our trip did us both good. We talked about anything and everything, our lives, separately and together. I've never felt closer to anyone than when I was with her, next to her. Each day and night with her showed me what finally living my life was like.

When she told me she loved me, I never felt happier because I loved her too, if not more. It was also big for her to say that to me since she had been so shy before. She had also bought me a jewelry box which was so sweet and I loved it. Not only did it look nice, but it was from her that's all that mattered.

I got offered a job to do and it was close to us. I also had the opportunity to finally get a cat which I have wanted for a while now. I didn't want to leave Y/N to go, so I invited her with me. I also remembered that she had some useful skills that Tammy had mentioned early on. It went as smoothly as possible and we got it done easily and swiftly. It was invigorating and I wanted her to be with me for all of my jobs. Her laughter and smile through the car ride back was just as fun too.

When I packed for the trip, I put the papers, which seemed ages old, into my suitcase. I wasn't positive if she wanted to work with me after all this time, but I still wanted to. It turned out that she was just as thrilled that I still had the papers as I was that she wanted to stay with me. Knowing that she wanted a future together, I got the confidence to ask her to be my girlfriend. I normally don't care much for labels because if you want to be with someone, you just will be. It isn't complicated, but I wanted to show Y/N that I wanted more than just a come and go relationship. I didn't want to be with anyone else.

And then, she was my girlfriend. I couldn't stop smiling and the trip couldn't get any better. I watched her get excited over couches and chairs that she loved and saw her eyes light up talking about the things that we could do with the new club.

Everything was amazing and my life had reached its peak, but Debbie had to come and ruin everything. Debbie didn't text me that she was coming over, she didn't tell me that she had picked the lock and came inside.

I was packing up some of my clothes since me and Y/N had decided that our vacation was ready to end. I had my bag laid out on the bed and folded some shirts and pants that I didn't want to leave here.

Debbie appeared at the doorway, smug and proud of herself for surprising me. "So you brought her here too." She walked closer to me. "I think you should find a different spot to take your lovers."

"You were never my lover." Debbie had somehow made me upset and she hadn't even said much.

"But I could be." She put her hands on my shoulders, forcing me to sit on the edge of the bed. "Imagine how great we would be together. Nothing could stop us."

"That's not going to happen, we both know that." It felt like I was trying to make a toddler follow orders and it was so frustrating.

"Y/N isn't even that great. I don't know what you see in her." Debbie paused and took a deep breath and she furrowed her brows at me like I was an idiot.

"Y/N is great. She is smart and thoughtful. She is gentle and makes me feel truly alive." I could have gone on and on talking about all the qualities that I loved. The way she slept on her side with her arms always wrapped around me. I loved how her eyes could look and reach into my heart.

Debbie turned and saw the jewelry box on the dresser. "A gift?" She turned her head to look at me.

"Yes." I really just wanted her to leave now.

"You really do love her, don't you?" Sadness peaked in through her eyes.

"I do." I didn't mind breaking Debbie's heart. She knew that I didn't love her the way she wanted me to.

"I can't compete, can I?" Her posture dropped and head sagged lower with each word that came out.

"Oh honey, you were never in the race." I was beginning to grin because I was going to make myself laugh. Others might have said that I was too harsh or that I shouldn't have been that cold, but Debbie was smarter than that. Her intelligence was high enough to understand that I didn't want to be with her. If I did, I would have done something about it years ago. It never felt right with her though, and I knew why now. I was meant to be with Y/N.

"I can try." She started unbuttoning the shirt she had on and flung it on the floor. She walked up close to me very slowly.

"Don't do this." I rolled my eyes and shook my head. I knew she wouldn't do anything but tease me and I wasn't falling for it.

She reached behind her back and undid the clasp and let her bra hang freely from her shoulders. She let the straps slide down each arm and took her bra into one hand. "Come on Lou..." and she took her hand and traced my jawline with the tip of her fingers.

I saw her glance away and then back at me quickly. I turned my head not catching what Debbie had said and saw Y/N at the doorway. I jumped off the bed and ran after her as she darted for the front door. She didn't want to listen to me and I get why, but I needed to tell her that Debbie had no hold on our relationship together.

After she left, I forced Debbie to go home and I got a cab back to the city because I was not going to sit in the car with Debbie for five hours. It was late when I reached the city and I headed straight to Y/N's house. I knocked a few times, but nothing happened, so I did what any logical person who was in my situation would do. I picked the lock and forced myself inside. I looked around to see it was the same as when we had left meaning that she never came home. I paced back and forth for a while before finally going to bed in Y/N's room so I could be surrounded by her, even if she was not there, and even if she was mad at me. I could pretend that things were alright although I didn't have her with me to hold her.

~Authors note: I added this song in particular bc I was thinking that this was Lou saying sorry for hurting y/n but also sorry to Debbie for not loving her. Anyways hope u like the story lol.

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