proper care ! remus lupin

great grief

Last Chapter

Remus stumbled through the path leading to his front door. In his hungover state, he didn't trust himself to apparate home, so he flagged down a muggle taxi to take him as far to his house before the anti-muggle charm kicked in.

The chilly November weather picked at his skin uncomfortably, making the loose clothing cling to his slighly sweaty body. He didnt have to turn the knob for the door to open, falling right through into his cramped living room.

After Hogwarts, he and Venus didn't make enough money for a big fancy house, but that never bothered her. It bothered him though. He wasnt able to provide her everything she deserved and he loathed himself for it.

She was meant to be a Magizooligist. That was her calling, but the war had become more prevalent and she turned to healing instead. She said it would be more useful for the Order if they had experienced healers.

In his living room, there was a box of old photo albums, presumably some that Venus were looking at while he was gone the previous night. His curiosity got the better of him, and he lifted up the photo book with tear stained eyes.

Page after page of him and his friends throughout their years at Hogwarts. Some were of James and Sirius' quidditch matches, some were posed ones that they had planned to send to their parents. Most of which were candid, with Remus behind the camera wanting to make sure he never forgot a thing.

Now he only wished to forget.

It was unfair. Everything was unfair. That seemed to be his life motto. He had to have pissed off Merlin somehow; why else did fate hate him so much to take his friends from him.

Time was supposed to heal wounds, but here he was on November 1st, a year after his best friends deaths, and he couldn't get past the first stage of grief.

He turned the page of the album and landed on a photo he had forgotten was there. The first picture of Remus and Venus together in the Kitchens during their fourth year.

Thanks to Thea, they now had a cute photo of their younger selves falling in love. He took out the photo and clung to it as his heart broke.

The tears in his eyes flooded the room in a desperate cry. Venus deserved more.

He needed to be better to her. He wasn't the only one who lost them. He had left her alone on the anniversary of his friends deaths because he couldn't cope, and now he needed to make it up to her.

He had to be better, for her. If he wanted any chance to be able to be better enough to ask her to marry him, he had to start now. The photo stayed loose in his grip and he wiped his eyes on his shirt in a desperate attempt to get some tears out.

There was no sign of her downstairs, so he walked up the rickety steps, trying to mentally prepare himself for a furious reaction.

The door to their bedroom was open, and he pushed it open gently, calling out for his girlfriend. He turned on the lightswitch, curtesy of muggle technology, and scanned the room to her laying on an armchair at the end of the bed.

"Venus, darling. I'm home now, and im not going anywhere this time." He sniffled, lowering down to nudge her awake. "Its you and me, okay?"