So Gone (Ed Sheeran)

You're miles away.

"You see, that's exactly what I was saying!" Flora let out.

"What do you mean?" I said, quietly. I wasn't mad. I knew this was coming, even though I despised the thought of it.

"You're away and you can't come back whenever you want. There's always something better to do." She sighed.

"But you don't understand. I'm headlining this show. This is the best opportunity I've had so far. I know I was supposed to come back this week end. Hell, I even asked for it! But now, I need to do this. There's going to be loads of people there, I could get a record deal, Flora! Please, don't make this harder than it already is."

I had been waiting for that moment my whole life. I wanted to be noticed, I wanted people to come and see me because they wanted to, not because I happened to play where they planned to go anyway. I hadn't expected to feel this way when it finally came. I wasn't supposed to dread announcing it to the ones I cared about. I was supposed to be over the moon.

"Why did I even expect you to come back?" She whispered.

"I promise I'll be back soon, love. We just have to be patient, and patience is a virtue." I smiled at this because she always told me that whenever she had the occasion to.

"I have to go." She suddenly said. The smile left my face.

I didn't have the time to say goodbye that she had already hung up. I hated this. I knew she didn't mean to make me choose between her and my possible career, but it felt like that to me.

I went downstairs, in the actual bar. I wasn't playing tonight, but I needed a bit of distraction. Maybe even a couple of drinks. I could handle it.

"Ed! How are you doing?" Mike asked when he saw me. I didn't know he was coming here, but right now, I could use a friend.

"I've seen better days. You?" I answered flatly and sat beside him at the counter.

He looked at me with that spill it look.

"Well, Flora and I kind of fought. I told her I would see her this week end, and now with that gig, which I can't believe I'm doing, I can't go. She was mad. And the worst is that I knew it was mostly against herself for believing me when I said I cared about her. And this angers me deeply because I care more about her than most things in the world." I let out.

"You know what I can't understand? Why are you so stupid when you're around her?" Mike chuckled. And I swear I felt like hitting my head against the counter several times. I was that frustrated. "Why didn't you ask her to come here?"

"She owns a coffee shop and can't leave it to anybody else, mostly because she doesn't trust anybody enough to do so. It's a family business. And I'm not stupid. I did think about that, but it was no use even asking." I sighed.

He just laughed. Thank you very much, Mike. This was just what I needed.

"I would never have imagined you so head over heels for someone." Mike breathed between fits of laughter.

"I'm not!" I defended myself. "She just helped me through a lot, and is like my only friend back there."

I honestly have thought a lot about it, about why I was craving her touch, or why her voice relaxed me as much as music did. I had found no answer, but I knew that this couldn't be love. I couldn't love. I didn't want to, nor did I need to.

She was a friend. And maybe the fact that I have never got any true friend could explain the weird feelings and cravings I had.

Or maybe this was just an excuse, and I didn't know what was responsible for my behaviour around her.