Spiderman/Peter Parker (and Avengers) One Shots

The British American (2)

So, I did a bit of research into the Cockney Accent (which is the London accent I'm giving Peter) and I'm just gonna be spelling a lot of words like how they sound. I will have the 'translations' so to speak at the end for when his accent (or a locals) gets thick. Anyways, this chapter is dedicated to Radytoread, Topase, Izzy_Stark, swordsrosesandpens, and Knightcore13796. I hope y'all enjoy!

---

Peter took a deep breath and smiled as he and Mr. Stark stepped out of the London Airport. "Home sweet home 'ay Mistah Stark!"

Tony laughed, "For you maybe." Tony peered around the street for a sign with his name on it. "I've been here a few times but only for business." Spotting the bold 'Tony Stark' he slapped Peter's shoulder and gestured to the waiting car. "That's why we have the itinerary for the trip. We're gonna act like full blooded tourists!" Tony beamed at Peter as he took the keys and popped the car's trunk.

Laughing Peter loaded his things into the boot. "I still can't believe the school let me stay at a separate hotel! We're gonna 'ave us a right good time!" Tony laughed and agreed as they both slid into the car. Chatting excitedly about what they were going to do first on the way to the hotel, Tony laughed at one of Peter's more accented phrases.

"The dog? What does that mean?"

Peter smirked, "You're a genius and you can't use context clues to figure out what the dog means?"

"What context clues?!" Tony yelled scandalized. "You were talking about being stranded in a shady neighborhood and all of a sudden someone lends you 'a dog' and you're saved?! That makes no sense!"

"Oh come on! I'm not even doing my full Cockney accent Mis'ah S'ark!" If I reawy wan'ed to confuse ya I'd 'ave told tha s'ory like this." Clearing his throat Peter said, "So I was ou' doin' me rounds yeah? Nicked a couple of tea leaf's for old bill an' reawized I had to get a wriggle on or ewse I'd 'ave to dog me aun'! When I wen' 'o check the lemon I no'iced me dog was bread! That was bang out of order mate 'cause I 'ad no way of knowin' what the lemon was or if the old bird was worried! So, I changed ou'a me sui' and inna summin be'er. I was sha'ered when I no'iced fis geezer cross fa frog havin' a fag. 'E didn' wook 'o dodgy so I approached 'im I did. Asked if I couwd borrow a dog to call the missus. Course, 'e didn' know I was reawy callin me aun'. Anyways, 'e got a dog from fa cat and le' me bell 'er. Wuckiwy, I wasn' any barney cause she 'ad just gotten 'ome an' was abwe 'o give you a bell."**

Tony openly stared at Peter like he was crazy. "You lost me a tea leaf's." Peter laughed loudly at that while Tony still tried to wrap his head around what he just heard. "Your dog was bread?" He whispered uncertainly.

Peter snorted, "That's what a Cockney accent sounds like Mistah Stark. What I'm doin' now would be considered a standard British accent."

"Okay, but can we please go back to the dog and the tea leaves? What does that mean?"

"So, in London there's somethin' called the Cockney rhyming slang. It's commonly used but usually only for small things. For example: Wha's the lemon and lime? That means 'what's the time'. You take the word time, rhyme it, then add something that goes with that rhyme. Lime rhymes with time and lemons go with lime. So, you say, 'What's the lemon and lime' instead of 'What's the time'. You get it?"

Tony made a face, "Eh, knida?"

Peter smiled, "They do it for a lot of things. Cat and mouse is house, dog and bone is phone, apple and pears are stairs." Peter shrugged, "It would probably make a bit more sense if we actually said the whole phrase, but we usually only use the first word. For example: 'Hey, can I borrow your dog?' or 'I don't adam ya, you'll be in quite a bit of barney for that!' Instead of saying the whole phrase I just used the first word and that can be confusing for some people."