No Need to Sleep Living in a Dream (Boy × Boy) ✔

CHAPTER 16: Elizabeth White

Evan Cooper

Evan had thought Junior would start feeling better once he was out of the hospital and in the comfort of Evan's home. It turned out to be the opposite.

Junior had politely thanked Evan's parents for letting him stay there, but his smile had faltered as soon as it was just him and Evan. He wasn't eating, which was like gambling with his life as he was diabetic, and he spent most of his time alone in the guest room.

"You should really stay in my room. My bed is big enough for both of us and I'd feel better, if I knew you're not dying of cerebral hemorrhage." Evan tried again. In his mind he added: Or hypoglycemia..

"I'll be fine." Junior promised half-heartedly and vanished into the bathroom. When he was done brushing his teeth, he walked in the guest room without saying good night.

Although Junior wouldn't admit it, Evan could see he had been crying from his red and puffy eyes. The way Junior shut everyone out was difficult for Evan to bear. He was the kind of person who always sought comfort from others when he was sad.

That night Evan couldn't sleep. He kept thinking about the things that had happened at school: what did Damien and the others do to Junior exactly? Why did he have to blurt Junior's secret in the middle of the hallway?

When he wasn't thinking about that, he was thinking about the things that had happened at Junior's home. The way Junior tipped over, the astonishment in his eyes.. and the thud, that was something Evan would probably never be able to forget.

But what bothered Evan the most was the story about Junior's mom. Junior had told it to the police, letting Evan sit by him and listen.

[CW: child neglect]

Liz, Elizabeth White, had been only 16 years old when she got pregnant with Junior. She wanted an abortion, but the pregnancy had been too far to have one. When Junior was born, Liz became exhausted and every time the baby cried, she started crying as well. Paul blamed the baby for Liz's condition and the worse she got the more he drank.

Liz couldn't bond with her infant son, which only made her depression worse. She started to think there was something wrong with her as a person and that she was a terrible mother. Paul refused to take her to see a doctor, as he didn't believe there was anything wrong with her and he didn't want to bring shame to the family.

As time passed, Liz started writing in her diary about her fantasies of hurting herself and Junior. She wrote about drowning them, burning the house and poisoning their food. When Junior was older, Paul made sure he read all those entries to know how much suffering he had brought to his own mother.

A year passed and Liz barely left her room anymore. Paul had to take care of the baby, which he didn't do gladly or well. Junior learned to know it didn't matter how much he cried, because there wasn't anyone giving him comfort. He was often hungry and he had to wear dirty diapers for such a long time he got rashes.

Paul told everyone Liz had abandoned him and the baby, even though all that time Liz lived in her room. By the time Junior was seven, he had already learned how to take care of her: to feed and wash her. To comb and braid her hair. It was a secret he was never allowed to speak of.

Paul despised Junior, who he thought had ruined their lives simply by being born. Liz never tried to stop Paul's angry outbursts, no matter how much Junior yelled for her help. Until one day Junior stopped screaming for her and learned to take the beating without making a sound, because no one was going to come save him.

And that was how things were in that house straight from a horror movie until the day Liz finally left her room and came to help them after all. She had had a postpartum depression that became a severe clinical depression once it was left untreated.