i tried: poems from a lost soul

Restless Now

Restless, now

I run

Through the maze of my mind 

Looking for the exit

Or entrance, mayhaps

And the ugly crow of a bird

And the humming of the air-con

The soundless tap of thumbs on the image of a keyboard

And the silence!

God, the silence

All threaten to drive me mad

Nails just this side of sharp enough to draw blood 

Skin tingling still

Because walking into a fucking glass door

Wasn't enough to make

It

Stop.

Then I turn, again,

Surprise! 

Room's the exact same as last you saw it

Two minutes ago

Was it always this dark?

Was it always this messy?

You remember you were supposed to clean your room today,

Was supposed to clean it for every day of the past week,

But really what's bodily hygiene to a good spot of existential dread?

Those steel strings haven't been touched in months,

You're still not even halfway through War and Peace,

Or King Lear, for that matter,

And why oh why are they so bloody long and so bloody wordy?

Why...

Good question, as good as any,

But how many were thinking when writing,

How many were thinking when reading,

And just how often is there a 'why'?

How often, why,

I've embraced my human nature as a broken record

Not too bad, really,

Almost fun,

Wonder if I will experience that in the company of agreeable persons tomorrow,

Desperately hope

Hope for what?

Back to the questions again

Endless questions

Long rambling questions with no answers

So we go back to the beginning

Running

Mind's maze.