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Broken

Broken by
Areeba019  

This review contains spoilers!

I have always been a fan of mystery and action. That being said, I was excited to read Broken, hoping to find another story that would take my breath away.

That, unfortunately, did not happen.
Starting with the cover, I feel like it could use some improvement. It is not bad, but not appealing either. The blurb is short and interesting, but with many errors that need to be corrected.

When it comes to the story, it, unfortunately, disappointed me. There are too many grammatical and punctuation errors that need to be corrected, such as misplaced commas, missing punctuation at the end of a sentence, wrong capitalization, awkward plural forms of nouns, mixing they’re and their/you’re and your, etc. But that is something that can be corrected relatively easily. I advise the author to go through each chapter once again.

The plot has potential; it only needs to be executed a bit differently. Reading the chapters, I had a feeling like the events were simply listed—the atmosphere was not built properly, and the moments that should have been exciting and shocking simply were not. There were also moments I found too impossible, like the car conveniently hitting Jessica when Morgan was about to kidnap her or how Morgan spilled a drink only to find a secret trap door leading to Riverdale Street.

The characters remained two-dimensional. Their actions were too unrealistic, taking into account their circumstances. For example, Morgan was suddenly kidnapped and managed to escape by stabbing two men, yet still went to school the next day as if nothing had happened (she was only thinking about Lydia’s betrayal). Also, the way she kidnapped Jessica just didn’t sit right with me.

The plot twist that happened in the third chapter did not come off as surprising, as the characters weren’t properly introduced beforehand. If the author wished to reveal “the villain” early on and still make it shocking, then they should have made the character feel more present in the story and closer to the reader, maybe by adding some more heart-warming moments between Lydia and Morgan (not telling the reader about them but showing them). The same goes for Zane: I wasn’t surprised when it was revealed that he was working with Lydia because he was only briefly introduced in the chapter before.

All in all, I think that with proper editing and revising the plot this story could live up to its potential. I think that the plot, in general, is interesting and has the potential to become a truly exciting story but needs to be worked on. I hope that this review does not discourage the author but motivates them to work on the story more. If there are further questions, I will be more than happy to answer them.