Spurt Of Love ʜ.s ғᴀɴғɪᴄ

•I want you but i'll let the universe decide that•

"Oh. My. God. Go talk to him." Hazel says, shaking me. She came looking for me when I was lost staring at harry while he was working at his flower shop.

He had a bright smile on his face and even a blind man could tell how much he loved his job. He was talking to an old lady customer who seemed like she was confused to either get white daisies or purples ones and he was helping her make up her mind. They were having a chat while I was wishing to be gulped by the ground right then and there. I tried to move but I couldn't until Hazel found me and I knew she was going to insist on talking to him.

"No! No no no no we need to leave. Let's go" I say grabbing Hazel's hand as I can feel a tang of panic starting to built in me.

"You're a nut Jane. I swear to fucking God he's right there. This is your sign. Go talk to him." Hazel shouts at my face as I try to cover her mouth to lower her voice.

"Shhh! He'll hear us" I whisper-scream at her.

"Jane! we're on a high street. He's not gonna hear us. You really are a nut. Go talk to him" Hazel whisper-screams back at me.

"No! What do you want me to say?" I look at her with confusion.
" 'Oh hi there. I know I told you to fuck off last time but I'm back so we should hit on with it' " I said with a fake greeting voice.

"You really fucked this up didn't you?" Hazel says with disappointment.

"Yes! And I can't talk to him. He's gone." I say with sadness as I look down at my shoes.

From a third perspective, if someone looked at us talking, it would look like I was some child who got caught eating sand or something. I really want to make this right but I can't because I feel like I don't have the right words to apologize. The look on his face was strong enough to easily break a rock in two when I told him that there was no connection between us, and I'm just a human. It broke him and I can't bear seeing that look on his face again. He looks happy now and I'm glad he is because this is what he deserves. Not some broken confused woman who doesn't even know what she wants.

Hazel scoffs.
"I guess if that's how it is." She says with a sad look on her face.

"It is. I'm happy and he's happy and that's what I want. He deserves to be happy." I look at her with a fake smile on my face. She searches my eyes to find the truth and I know she's knows that i'm lying when I say I don't want to be with him.

"Ugh! Okay. I guess I'll have to do it my way" and before I could comprehend what she means, she starts rushing towards the flower shop.

"What? No! Get- Get back Hazel. I swear to God I will never ever talk to you if you- Hazel!" I rush towards her and try to grab her hand but she screams a big OUCH as if I just broke her wrist.

I have no idea how many people turned their necks on us but the one I was concerned for, was Harry's as he looked at us with a surprised and worried look on his face.

I froze and straightened myself up to look composed as Hazel approached the shop with a smile on her face.

"Oh my God I know they look so pretty Jane!" she said pointing at the flowers and I follow her. Why does this always happen to me? I think to myself as I can feel the tears gathering in my eyes.

"Yeah" I whisper. I can feel my voice cracking up. I don't even know if Harry is looking at us or not because I feel like I will run away to hell if I look at him. I don't want to see the disappointment or sadness on his face. I just straight away don't want to see his face period but I guess this is what Hazel meant when she said we'll find our way. I don't believe in destiny or fate. Is there even a difference I have no fucking idea but I don't know what to call this.