i want it all ( gg next gen )

𝗴𝗼𝘀𝘀𝗶𝗽 𝗴𝗶𝗿𝗹

𝗱𝗶𝘀𝗰𝗹𝗮𝗶𝗺𝗲𝗿: 𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗹 𝗻𝗮𝗺𝗲𝘀 𝗼𝗳 𝗽𝗲𝗼𝗽𝗹𝗲 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝗯𝗲𝗲𝗻 𝗮𝗹𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗲𝗱 𝘁𝗼 𝗽𝗿𝗼𝘁𝗲𝗰𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗶𝗻𝗻𝗼𝗰𝗲𝗻𝘁. 𝗻𝗮𝗺𝗲𝗹𝘆, 𝗺𝗲.

𝗧𝗛𝗥𝗘𝗘 𝗖𝗜𝗡𝗗𝗘𝗥𝗘𝗟𝗟𝗔𝗦

Morning, Upper East Siders, I trust you've all slept well. I know I haven't. I took a day off work after the big party, mostly to cure my hangover, but also because the amount of tips I got from all of you was astonishing, and far too much to read through with the headache I had. So that's why I've been up all night, sifting through all the dirty secrets of the night.

Whoever spread the rumour that the Archibalds were strictly herbal guys clearly didn't see G on Friday night. Rumour has it that he was spotted pill-popping with the Prince and Princess of narcotics Friday night. Careful, G, I hope you haven't forgotten how that went down with your Granddad. I know N hasn't.

And whatever happened to D and S hanging out sober? Is it simply impossible to stomach each other's company when they aren't seeing double?

But hey, I'm not one to judge. Whatever gets you going, I guess. And if the multitudes of tips I got saying our infamous couple disappeared off into a bedroom for an extended period are true, it certainly got them going.

Way to loose your v card coked up and on molly, D!

In other news, who'd have thought Blondie was the responsible Van der Humphrey twin now. Apparently she was spotted piling herself off into a cab before the clock had even struck twelve! No glass slipper, S?

I wonder if she was fleeing a Prince Charming... or maybe even Princess.

Speaking of royalty, Little H had a lot to say to M last night, and even managed to sneak off with him to one of the dimly lit bedrooms. Is it finally high time for our prim and proper queen bee to follow in her mother's footsteps and lose her virginity to a scandalous bachelor like M. If she really is as innocent as she seems, that is.

And if she and M really did do the deed at the party on Friday, then why was Little H seen the morning after leaving a certain East 87th Street townhouse? Scandalous!

And finally, in the most boring news of the weekend, H and his long-suffering ex, C were spotted locking lips in the lobby of the Empire on Saturday like all was forgiven. I wonder how long this will last...

That'll be all for now, Upper East Siders, I need to go get my morning Birch Coffee and have a stroll in Central Park. See if you can spot me (I bet you can't).

You know you love me,
xoxo, Gossip Girl