Desiderium

13| Good night

A R A B E L L A

F L A S H B A C K

I tasted the metallic bitterness of blood in my mouth as I tried to sit up. The floor was as dirty as my skin was by now. I was covered with bruises, blood, and dirt. I was so sick of this place. I am fucking exhausted.

I stared at the bruises forming on my wrist and closed my eyes trying not to remember the event that had just happened. I can't believe they did this. And I don't even feel any kind of pain or sorrow now. I just feel numb.

I moved my gaze to the blue-eyed boy sitting a few meters away from me. He had his knees curled up and wrapped his hands around them bringing them closer to his chest as he cried while looking at me. In my state.

"I am so sorry, I couldn't protect you, Ella. I tried to fight them but they knocked me out." He muttered. His voice is completely vulnerable and helpless.

"It's not your fault. None of this is. We will get out of here together." I smiled sadly ly at him. I didn't want him to blame himself for something that he had no control over. And he was suffering too. Proof of it was his broken arms that weren't healing properly and the scar that formed on his left cheek.

Are we ever going to be out of here? Is this our own personal hell made for us to pay for our sins?

We have been stuck here for weeks now. No one has found us yet. Our families must be going crazy. I can't even imagine mom's state. She must be devastated. And she will be even more upset when she finds out what they did to me.

How did a simple trip to the grocery store end up with us being kidnapped? I knew the Russians were the ones behind all of this. Those motherfuckers were brutal and had no morals. No honor.

"You should sleep." I suggested.

"I wish I could. But I can't." He sighed and gets up slowly then limped toward me. He sat next to me, leaning his back against the cold wall. I tilted my head on his shoulder and hummed a song to make me relax after the trauma I had just endured.

"Sleep, Arabella. I promise I will protect you this time." He murmured, kissing my temple. I wanted I fight my fatigue but I haven't slept for days. The urge was just too tempting that I let the darkness take over.

I just hope we get out of this place alive as soon as possible. I need this to be over. I don't know how long I can handle this torture.

F L A S H B A C K       O V E R

I woke up with my heart racing as I keep panting like I ran a fucking marathon. I haven't had those nightmares in a while but I guess Mom's death triggered me. I shrugged the cup of water that I had placed on my bedside table. And got up to the bathroom to wash my face.

I can't go back to sleep. I am too scared. Scared of the monsters that can come back to haunt me in my sleep. Every fucking nightmare feels like reliving the experience all over again.

I wonder if I will ever get better. If I will ever stop needing the sleeping pills to get a good night's sleep. I wonder if will ever properly heal.

Looking out from my window, I noticed that the lights in the living room were still on. So I decided to go and see who was still awake, going that maybe they could distract me from my own betraying mind.

I should have known it would be him. I soon as I arrived at the room, I was met with the sight of my oldest brother—Leonardo—sitting on the couch with a ton of paperwork in hand and a glass of rum in the other. He was still wearing his suit and still didn't notice me as he was too focused on his work.