We Go On

Chapter Sixteen

     Three days have passed since Carters' death. Katherine could barely get out of bed, so her sister flew in from California and took charge of the funeral arrangements.

     Charlie tried to go on, to keep going just like Carter told him to. But he couldn't. He didn't get to say goodbye. And that reminder punched him in the gut every chance it got.

***

     It was the day of the funeral, Katherine sat up by the casket with her sister, being greeted by all the visitors.

     Charlie, Samantha, Maria, Erick, and Liam all sit in the front row, with a blue rose in hand. Classmates and teachers from school came to pay their respects.

     Charlie walks up to Carter's casket, tears streaming down his face. He places a hand over Carters'. Her skin wasn't warm, the pink in her lips was gone. The dimple on her left cheek isn't there. Someone had done her makeup, she would never have chosen those colors.

     Carter liked to keep her look neutral. She hated all the attention being on her, so she did everything possible to blend in with the crowd. She would never have agreed to a lilac dress. She would have said it's too happy.

     Maria approaches Charlie, placing her hands on his shoulders, breaking him from his trance.

     "I miss her." he says softly

     "I miss her too." she says and he wraps his arms around her, letting her cry into his chest.

     As the church fills up, Charlie prepares himself for the speech he was asked to give. He gets up to the podium and looks at the TV screen that is playing a slideshow of pictures and videos of Carter they had all put together.

     The next slide is of him and Carter, holding hands while swinging on the swing set, laughing at each other. They were only 7 in that picture, but even then, he knew she would always be an important person in his life.

     Charlie steadies himself on the podium, holding a small piece of paper folded up in his hand. He adjusts the microphone and waits for the room to quiet down.

     He looks over to Carter in her casket. It took all of his strength to keep the tears at bay. He remembers the folded piece of paper in his hand. Clearing his throat, he turns his attention back to the crowd.

     "Good afternoon everyone, I'm Charlie. I was one of Carters' best friends, along with Sammy, Maria, Erick, and Liam. We've been best friends for a very long time..." he swallows hard, calming his emotions before continuing. "We didn't know she was sick... We didn't know... and I wish we did. But she wanted it that way. And I wish we could've had more time. But I was lucky to have the time that we did.

     Carter, you were the best thing that's ever happened to us." he gestures to his friends who were tearing up on the pew in the front, hand in hand. "We were as different as can be, but that made our bond stronger. You were always the quiet one, but you always made the adventures more fun.

    Your nose was always in those books and you once said, 'Fiction is better than reality...' How I wish we would have seen that as a sign. We should have, I should have..." his voice caught in his throat.

     "You were a bright person, but you were too bright for this world. And I know you'll be shining your light in a world that deserves you, in a world that makes you happy.

     We're going to miss your smile, your laugh, your love for the stars, the way you loved in general. God, I miss you so much, Carter... You still had a whole life ahead of you, and we weren't ready to let you go. Because we never thought we would need to be ready." he looks down at the piece of paper in his hand.