Hoe Tales

The Worst Kind of Whore

The worst whore and the best whore are one in the same. It really all depended on how you looked at life. At 23 I saw myself as one of the best whores, I was with a man who didn't know he was being played. And before you feel sorry for him, remember that he was sleeping with and impregnating half of Jamaica, myself included.

How O got me pregnant still puzzles me today, I was careful. After my gonorrhea infection I never played with my health or wellbeing, but how didn't matter. What mattered was I was pregnant. There was no question as to who the father was, O was the only person I had slept with since Lee. I was all of a sudden thankful that O had gotten in the way of me sleeping with L, at least I didn't have to worry about paternity.

No news could have made O happier, I was stuck with him, regardless of what I wanted. He knew it was his child and never even tried to question it which led me to believe that he had impregnated me purposefully. Once again I was providing something Sham didn't. If O loved me before, he was obsessed now.

Just like Sham, me and O wanted different things. My Toyota was getting old and I needed an upgrade, O wanted one more child. During that time O was doing a lot of work internationally. He was teaming up with big named American rap and pop stars so he was hardly around. When he did end up on the island he had so many women to attend to that I only saw him for a day or so.

I was going to the doctor and keeping him up to date on his unborn child, what O didn't know was that I was seeing a doctor I knew personally and had already made arrangements to get rid of it. I did NOT want a child, not at 23, not ever. I liked my freedom, I wouldn't trade it for anything, certainly not something that would constantly need or require me for survival.

I had long since accepted the person I was and I knew that no child deserved a parent like that. At the same time I wasn't going find a winning lottery ticket and throw it away. For as long as I was pregnant O would be sending money and not the little $20,000. The first thing I needed was a better diet. I needed fresh fruits and vegetables and that wasn't cheap. There was a doctor's note to prove my claims of needing a healthier diet. According to my doctor I was anemic and it wasn't good for the baby. When O heard that he got to the first Western Union he could find in New York and told me to feed his baby.

Three weeks later I needed something else, but this time I didn't ask him directly. I was talking to a neighbor when I called O's phone. It was something I had done before, calling him by accident I mean, so I hoped he wouldn't think anything of it.

"Yes Miss Cherry, the car get weh from me! Mi a drive and a guh round one corner and when mi press dung pan the breaks, no breaks, a ova inna bush mi end up."

"But a weh yaah seh"

"Yes, mi neva fraid suh yet, is not that mi nuh waah carry yuh guh down wid mi, mi jus fraid fi drive back the car an supm happen. Mi affi guh walk till mont en when mi carry it guh garage." I tried to sound convincing

"But yuh nuh cudda crash?"

That was all O needed to hear, there was no way I was going to be putting his child in danger. When he called me back I pretended to have no idea that I had phoned him. I acted surprised and happy to hear from him. By the end of the call I was planning another trip to Western Union.

The pregnancy changes were not kind to me. There were times when I even contemplated whether or not it was my karma. I couldn't keep anything down, I could hardly get out of bed, I was losing weight and it was showing.  Sham of course knew nothing of my pregnancy, and was skeptical of my health. Whenever you saw someone that was sickly all of a sudden and for no reason, it was AIDS.

People started speculating, I was relatively a stranger in Port Antonio and no one knew of me having a man. It was making sense to them, they finally knew why this quiet woman stayed by herself and never had a man around. It had to be the AIDS.