The Fallen Roses

Chapter 5

The freezing wind sent chills up my spine as I stood up to get a better look at the man who had greeted me. He slowly removed his hood. I'd recognize that face and grey beard anywhere....it was Sasha's father. "How are you here?" I asked as I embraced him with a hug. I sat down beside him shivering. "Well young one that is a question that only you can answer." He replied. I looked at him trying to wrap my head around what he was saying.

"I see that you are confused. To put it quite simply I am a manifestation of your subconscious. I can always change my appearance." He said as he morphed into a younger version of me. I looked around the frozen lands "So where are we?" I asked. He pointed to his head. "This is the deepest realm of your subconscious your "Inner Realm". It's been finally awakened I've been waiting a long time for you to arrive." He replied. So that must mean that during my fight with Other I blacked out and manifested within my own "Inner Realm".

If this was my own mind that means that I could manifest anything. I snapped my fingers and was instantly covered in Eskimo gear. Yes the warmth was so arousing to my skin. "Also don't worry Other will not come here it's too cold. Needless to say it doesn't mean he won't since I'm sure he knows that you're here." He replied. I didn't really understand why I was here.

"I can tell you're wondering why it is that you are here." He said. I nodded. "Well throughout your life you've been subconsciously locking away memories here in this endless realm. Like a storage container if you put it into perspective." He said. "However you took it a bit further." He said as he held out his had. Above his palm a small chest hovered. I could feel the energy radiating towards me as I begun to reach out to it. "No." He said as he pulled away. "It's too dangerous.". I couldn't help but wonder what was inside this chest that he would show it to me, but not let me touch it.

"You know what this is because you are naturally drawn to it." He said. I had this disturbing feeling that I knew what it was. "These are your emotions." He said as he once again changed, but this time he changed into Sasha and a tear couldn't help but to fall from my eye. "Don't cry I change based on what your mind feels at the time. I'm still just your subconscious ." She said. I wiped the tear away it was warm to see her again even if she wasn't really here. "Follow me." She said as she began to walk away. I followed her closely making sure not to fall too far behind.

She explained that due to years of being exposed to immense trauma I had begun locking away my emotions. "You were raised to believe that showing emotions as a man was a sign of weakness." She said "Also the reason that I have turned into Sasha is because you remember that she told you that you were emotionless and nonchalant." She said. I thought for a second and she wasn't wrong, but was it really my fault that I was this way an emotionless living corpse? Had it really been this way the entire time. " You love her, but you don't know how to show your feelings and it is because they are locked away. Sadly losing her was the key to opening the gateway to this realm." She said.

I could feel myself start to get angry, and the temperature in the air begun to rise as the snow begun to melt. She slowly placed her arm on my shoulder. " You must learn to control your emotions. If you can't not only will Other take full control of your body, but the power of emotions in this chest could kill you." She said. I begun breathing slowly as the cold air began to refill the area. "Though Other is the living embodiment of your emotional trauma he is still a part of you which can make you vulnerable to being unwillingly controlled." She explained. We continued walking as we reached a pool of water. It was so clear that it was translucent. "What is this?" I asked as I bent down touching the water.

"Every man must find himself in life, and now it is finally time that you find yours." She said as she lifted me in the air telepathically. " Wait what are you doing?" I asked as she dangled me over the pool of water. " This is your Mental Abyss. It's as deep as your brain capacity allows it to be so it probably goes on forever." A small brush of fear came over me because I knew I couldn't swim. She unlocked the chest and tossed it into the abyss and it began bubbling vigorously. "Find yourself young one, and remember if you die in here you'll become a vegetable in the real world." She said

"Will I ever see you again Sasha?" I asked. She laughed and smiled. "Remember I'm just you subconscious Rose I'm always here with you, but you must go out there and find your love for yourself and tell her how you feel if you can find yourself." She dropped me. I begun sinking into the abyss as a stream of lights rushed out of the chest and into my body. I screamed out from the pain that begun to fill my body. Emotions begun to fill my very being as I sank further down.

"So this is how it is then." A voice called out from behind Sasha. There was Other standing bundled up in a North Face bubble jacket. "I can't believe that you actually showed up here." She replied. " Well I guess if the king has decided on finally holding onto the throne then it would have been in my best interest to show up." He replied. Wait a minute I'm still inside my own mind I can control what's going on I just have to control my emotions.

Slow your breathing I kept telling myself. I could feel myself being able to breathe within the deep waters of the abyss. "One, Two, Three...." I kept repeating closing my eyes as the pain from absorbing the emotions of joy and love finally began to subside. Fall deeper and deeper into the calm majestic abyss. Let it reawaken your true self. "One,Two,Three..."

"Rose! Rose! Put the gun down!" I could hear Areail scream out as I opened my eyes. I looked over to her as she had her gun drawn on me. While I had mine firmly against my forehead. I quickly dropped it and fell to my knees in tears. She came over to me and hugged me tightly "It's okay Rose it's okay I understand everything." She said calmly. As I regained my composure I told her everything that happened. "It's okay Rose I know about Other." She said.

"Well I guess everything had come full circle." I said. She nodded her head.m as she handed me the envelope from Dr. Mitchell. "Thank You I said." As I begun to read the letter inside the envelope my iPhone began to ring. I looked at the name and couldn't believe my eyes it was coming from Sasha's phone. I showed Areail and she quickly swiped and put it on speaker phone. "Hello there Detective Jones and Rose." A distorted voice said. "Who the fuck is this!" I yelled out. "Don't worry about that you'll find out soon enough. Detective if you'd be so kind to meet me at the tree in the middle of Northridge Park tomorrow at noon and please do leave the Rose behind." The voice said.