The secret - an Evansson story

6

~September 2009~
"I can't believe you had a kid and never told me!" Ryan bellowed from the kitchen where he and Scarlett stood.

"I shouldn't have to tell you!" She yelled. "She wasn't a part of my life, my family, she didn't exist to me until now!"

Completely disobeying Scarlett, Aleah stood at the top of the stairs, eavesdropping. Her small six year old brain knew they were arguing about her, but she couldn't quite understand why.

"You gave that kid up like garbage!" He boomed. "All because you didn't want to face the consequences!"

"That's not true!" Scarlett screamed, her voice cracking.

"You are Aleah's mother!" He scolded. "You and Chris gave that girl life, and you abandoned her!"

The six year old perked up. What did he mean, Scarlett was her mother? She thought. The only mother the little girl knew died only two nights ago.

"And instead of accepting that, you lied to me." He said sternly. "You lied to everybody."

The 24 year old felt defeated. She stood still, letting her head hang as Ryan turned around to face the kitchen sink. He ran the water, splashing water on his face to cool down.

"Is mommy not my real mommy?" The little girl asked, causing both Ryan and Scarlett to whip around.

Her eyes were brimmed with tears as Aleah stood there, looking for an answer.

"Yes, sweetie." Scarlett cooed, kneeling down in front of the girl. "She was your mommy, but..."

Scarlett looked up at Ryan who stood behind her, giving her a little nod. The 24 year old let out a long sigh.

It's been less than twenty four hours of knowing the girl and she's already asking something that makes Scarlett feel so uncomfortable.

She placed her palms on the little girl's cheeks as she took a deep breath.

"...But I'm also your mama." She breathed but Aleah shook her head not understanding.

"But I thought-" Aleah's brows scrunched up in confusion.

Scarlett shook her head, sighing as she tried to think of something simple to say for the child to understand.

"Your mommy and daddy raised you." Scarlett clarified. "But you came from me."

"So you're my mama?" Aleah hesitated. She looked up at Ryan. "Are you my-"

"How about we make you some lunch?" Scarlett interrupted, trying to make the situation less awkward for Ryan.

Aleah nodded as Scarlett took her hand and led her to the pantry.

The two could hear Ryan quickly grab his keys and slam the door shut behind him; his car engine starting and the wheels screeching as he backed out of the driveway.

Scarlett let out an exasperated sigh as she grabbed some bread and peanut butter from the pantry before getting jelly from the fridge.

"Can I call you mama?" Aleah questioned in a sweet and innocent tone as she watched the 24 year old make her sandwich.

"No." Scarlett said harshly without any hesitation.

This was supposed to be temporary, it has to be temporary. The 24 year old wasn't ready for this responsibility and as much as she knew Chris wanted to be a father, she knew he wasn't ready either.

"Oh." Aleah sighed, she didn't understand anything.

If Scarlett was her mother, why couldn't she call her mama?

"But-" Aleah tried.

"Aleah, not now." Scarlett snapped as she placed the sandwich in front of the little girl.

While Aleah ate her peanut butter and jelly sandwich, Scarlett searched through her pantry. Nothing, there was absolutely nothing in there that a six year old would eat.

"Shit." She mumbled, closing the pantry door in frustration.

"You said a curse word!" Aleah mocked, giggling a little. However, Scarlett was in no mood.

"Aleah, go upstairs." She growled.

Aleah's expression quickly changed from a smile to a frightening look.

"Now." She sternly said, pointing toward the stairs. Aleah still didn't move, her eyes filling up with tears.

"But-" Aleah tried, she didn't understand why she was in trouble.

"Do you ever listen!?" Scarlett yelled. "I asked you to stay in your room earlier and you didn't listen, now go upstairs. Now!"

Aleah ran upstairs to the spare bedroom across from Scarlett and Ryan's bedroom. The room wasn't decorated for a six year old and the bed was way to tall for Aleah to climb onto. But, according to Scarlett, this was now her room.

The 24 year old cleaned up the half eaten sandwich and sat down to calm herself before going upstairs into Aleah's room.

"Hey, you wanna go shopping?" She asked in a sweet tone, trying to make up for being so rude.

Aleah shook her head and pouted, her arms crossed as she sat on the floor beside the bed.

"Don't you want things to eat and play with while your here?" Scarlett asked trying to bribe the child.

Aleah looked up with a red blotchy face and glossy green eyes. Immediately, Scarlett sat down beside the child, with a pang of guilt washing over her.

"I'm so sorry for yelling at you." She began. "You did nothing wrong, I was just mad with Ryan and I took it out on you."

Scarlett brought the girl into her embrace, stroking her head that rested on the 24 year old's shoulder.

"But I didn't listen to you." Aleah sniffled.

"I know, and we'll work on that, okay?" Scarlett said, moving her head back so she could look into Aleah's eyes.

Aleah nodded, her head still resting on Scarlett's shoulder as they sat in each others embrace for a little while longer.

"Why can't I call you mama?" Aleah asked after a while of silence. Scarlett hesitated, trying to think of an answer that won't hurt the little girl that sat on her lap.

"Your mommy and daddy deserve that title more than I do." She whispered.

"But they aren't here anymore." Aleah stated as she lifted her head from Scarlett's shoulder to make eye contact with her.

Scarlett looked into the girl's eyes, her face only inches away. I created this. She thought as she searched the girl's face. Her eyes, lips, and nose were an exact replica of Scarlett's.

"I know." Scarlett gave the child a sad smile before bringing the little girl back into her embrace.