女面 - Bungo Stray Dogs Fanfiction

Osamu Dazai's Entrance Exam - Two -

A/N: I apologise for the delay. Writer's block sucks, if I may be honest with you dear readers. Anyways, hope you like this chapter. Take care. <3

Dear Sirs and Madams,

I hope this message finds everyone at the Armed Detective Agency in good health. I have a most earnest plea for you good people, and although you must surely be otherwise occupied, please head my request.

To be frank, there is a building in which a bizarre happenstance occurs night after night, so I request the services of a detective of yours. The building is supposed to be unoccupied, but every night, ghastly groans and whispering voices can be heard coming from it; furthermore, a faint light can be seen flickering in its windows. I request your services to set my own heart and the hearts of the others living in the vicinity at ease.

It is such a very base request, but please discover if this is a prank or not, and if it is a prank, please determine the reasons and methods for it. I would be most pleased to learn the truth of this matter. It is only very little, but I have had the fee sent to you. I should like a receipt for it.

Furthermore, I would like you to keep the details of this request a secret; although it is a really selfish thing to ask, I do request it from you good people.

Thank you very much for your time. Please have a wonderful day.

How idiosyncratic to start the day with such a circumlocutory mail. Though it seemed like another one of our client's requests, there was one glaring issue - the email was sent incognito. No name, no location; nothing we could use to contact them when we complete the investigation. Had it not been for the fee that promptly arrived via mail, we might've considered rejecting this request. It could've been a deliberate move on the sender's part, but alas, we digress.

The sun had set. The night sky, clawed by the silvery moonlight that shone onto the rippling bay, was illuminated with the bright lights of Yokohama. The evening city streets filled with clamour that rivaled the thundering waves. Kunikida and I were walking through the traffic overlooking the harbour. Dazai trailed behind, gleefully bobbing about. It was quite a day having to deal with the hyperactive man, who'd mistaken hallucinogenic mushrooms with lethal ones. Although, thankfully - if I may say so - he's finally able to attend to his duties now.

"Kunikida-san, you know your ability that you used before; Doppo Poet?" he piqued suddenly. "Show me it again."

"I shall not." was the said man's assertive reply. "I do not real my Ability carelessly. Moreover, it consumes a full page of my notebook each time I use it. The artisan who produces these notebooks creates no more than one hundred of these products within a year at an exceptional price. I supposed you would use it for some cheap gag or the like, no?"

"Touche~" Dazai's attention then shifted to me. "Kunikida-san is a pretty serious man. Right, Enchi-san?"

"I'll leave that for you to decide." was my curt response.

"So cold..." he whined, a pout plastered on his face.

Regardless, Kunikida could care less. He checked his wristwatch and then glanced over his shoulder. "Let's go, Enchi-san."

"Okay." I responded.

"Dazai, pick up your pace a little." he said brusquely. "We will be late to our appointment at this rate."

"All this talk of time, Kunikida-san, but as far as I can recall, we never agreed upon a particular time to meet our informant, correct?" questioned Dazai.