My Dad's Friend (Boyslove)

My Dad's Friend: 17

«JARVIS'S POINT OF VIEW »

"Brother, Brother!" A high pitched voice of a nine years old boy echoed around the house as his tiny legs ran into the house with full urgency, ignoring his parents that came his way, reaching for the stairs as he called his brother, he was about to run up the stairs when a thirteen years old boy came running down hastily and a affrighted expression on his face.

"Jarvis, what's wrong, are you alright?" He scrambled down the stairs, instantly reaching his little brother.

The younger instantly held up his hand, the older's eyes landing on the little cut on his thumb, slightly bleeding. The older gasped and his eyes widened, grabbing the younger's wrist and pulling him to the kitchen, washing the blood off on the sink. "Does it hurt?" He asked, glancing up at the younger, who didn't take his eyes away from his face for a second, staring at him with those genuine, righteous grey orbs, completely clueless.

The younger beamed. "it used to but it doesn't hurt anymore. Your touch made the hurt go away"

The older giggled and led him over to the counter, helping him get on the counter, their mother walked in with a little first aid box, handing it over to the older, knowing the younger wouldn't let her attend to him without wailing and she's didn't want that.

"How did you get hurt, kiddo?" The older asked, opening the box 

The younger gaped, all his attention cemented on that face, he stared without blinking, fearing he would disappear when his eyes would flutter. The little one snapped back to reality when the older one snapped his fingers in front of him.

"There must be something on my face if you feel no pain when I applied the cream on your injury" 

The younger glanced down and his mouth made an O shape when he realized his finger hand had been patched already. He grinned widely, leaning down, and placed a kiss on his brother's forehead. "Thank you, Levi"

The older froze for a moment before chuckling and brushing his finger at the tip of the younger's nose. "You are cute"

«END OF FLASHBACK»

I instantly wiped off the teardrop that slipped down my cheek. The memory, why did it come back all of a sudden?  These memories, why did they still haunt me? I opened the tap and slapped water on my face in the bathroom sink. I stared at my reflection, the bags under my eyes had become evident, this tiredness on my face became plausible.

Why me? Why did it have to be me? Why couldn't I live my life just like every typical teenager but I scoffed at the thought of being normal. I was the oddball and I had always been. I would never be normal, not after the inexpiable depravity I had committed.

No normal teenager found her elder brother glamorous to the point of having wet dreams about him.

At first, I thought it was just a brotherly love as I grew older and got more affixed, I realized it wasn't just a brotherly affection anymore, I realized the feelings inside of me ran deeper than I thought. At fifteen, I came to realize I was in love with my elder brother, I realized I loved Levi more than a brother.

I remembered filling the toilet with my vomit when the realization hit me and to make things worst than they already were, he was there, patting my back, asking if I was okay, taking care of me as a brother would while my thoughts were vague.

I was disgusted with myself, I feared he would hate me, I feared if he would leave when he finds out. With that thought in mind, I created the distance myself, he noticed but chose not to comment but the gap grew wider with each passing day and when I finally went to college, I thought it would be over if I didn't see him anymore but my feelings worsened, so did my health.

I thought sleeping around and drinking would help me forget but nothing had helped, made things worse, I realized I had no cure or Levi was my only cure but he was the forbidden fruit in the garden. He was near yet so far away from my reach. I let out a dry cough, my throat burning.

"Jarvis?! Are you alright in there, we have been waiting for you"

Instantly I wiped my hand and face before going over to the door and opened it, being met with the brown orbs of my mother, Mrs. Viviana. She stared at me worriedly, bringing her hands up to cup my face. "Oh my, I haven't seen you in a month and you already look so pale and skinny. Are you not eating? Not sleeping?"

She would probably disown me if I told her I was and had been always in love with her oldest son, it would ruin our oh-so-perfect family and I didn't want that. I didn't wish to drag anyone else to my wrecked life. I nodded at her questions. "I am fine, Mom. School has been stressful"

"Why is why I wanted you to stay here with us but you prefer your dorm and I didn't want to force you"

I understood her worry but school was the least of my problems. "You don't have to worry mom, I will be fine and look after myself" I gave her a little smile

She gave me a funny stare. "I doubt that maybe you should move in with Levi, he will look after you the best" she shook her head, recalling something. "Your brother and his girlfriend have been waiting for us in the dining room. They just arrived" she pat my cheeks and walked away.

I stayed still for a moment before following her from behind. My eyes were dimmed, gloomy as usual, my jaw was clenched just like my knuckles were clenched into a fist. I shadowed her to the dining room, finding my dad sitting on the edge of the table while Levi and his girlfriend were sitting on the right side of the table.

I glared at the lady in a white dress, looking like an angel with her black hair and charming brown orbs, she was beautiful and that spiked my anger.

As if sensing my heated gaze on her, she lifted her head and her brown eyes met mine before looking away, I watched her shift uncomfortably on her seat, smiling but faltering.

"Jarvis, sit down. Don't stare at our guest like that, it's rude!" Mom scolded, sitting over at the other edge.

I went over to the opposite side and sat down and my eyes instantly met his and my breath instantly hitched at how breathtaking he was, I could see a peek of his clean chest beneath his white sleeves that were left unbuttoned at the top, the way strains of hair fell on his forehead, my eyes trailed down to his Adam apple and watched it jerked up and it, my throat making a gulping sound.

I met his eyes to find him staring at me too and I felt exposed at my wretched appearance and unguarded under his gaze, he had never had problems reading me before and I looked away before I could give away too much of what I was trying so hard to hide.