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Chapter Forty - I've Become Emotionless

I was gin and you were toxic, we had nothing good in common,

Wish we just stayed platonic, we tried,

But my mind gets dark and ominous, can't change it, it's just how it is,

At least I'm being honest, no lie,

I don't feel like anyone, the world's mad and they say I'm the crazy one,

So I just stay numb and carry on, too young to hate someone,

Truth is it was never love, your fault if you thought it was,

-Madison Beer, "Stay Numb And Carry On,"

***

Archie

"She asked me about baby names," she chuckles lightly, as her hands rake softly through my hair, my head rests gently on her stomach as I admire our child, softly caressing and kissing the small bump, 

"What did you say?" I ask, knowing we haven't really spoken about names yet, 

"I said yes, but I don't know anymore," she replies, 

"What's the name?" I ask glancing up at her, 

"I was thinking we could name her after your dad," she says slowly, my eyebrows lace together as I look up at her bewildered, 

"Fred? Do you want our daughter to be bully bait?" I joke, 

"Not exactly I was thinking her middle name could be Winifred, I know it's unconventional but I thought that if you had a little piece of your dad in her then you wouldn't feel like just because he's gone there's no point to anything anymore," she confesses her voice fading out with each word, I can feel my eyes becoming glossy as I let her words sink in, my eyes shut as I exhale the memories of that night in the shower when I'd broken down in her arms flood my mind causing tears to spill, she's always been there for me, through every single thing, good or bad, it's her that's by my side, it's one of the many reasons I love her because I can count of her for anything, I feel her fingertips graze my jaw as she guides my face downward joining our lips together, 

"I love you," I sigh, 

"I love you too," she says, 

"I don't feel like that anymore, because I have you and I have her, and you two are all that matters to me," I assure, resting my head on her shoulder, 

"I know," she says holding me closer, "Can I tell you something?" she adds, 

"Hmm," I hum in response as I close my eyes, 

"I know I was adamant on her being a boy, but I secretly always felt like she was a girl, I even had a dream about it," she reveals, 

"How was she? In your dream?" 

"She was perfect, she had your eyes and your nose, and your lips but with my hair and skin tone, and she had a bunch of freckles and the cutest little dimples, we named her Scarlett Winifred Andrews," she says, 

"She's supposed to have your name too," I remind, 

"I know but in my dream, we were married," she shrugs as if it's some casual thing, though it's not the thought of it alone makes my heart swell, 

𝐅𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐖𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐁𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐟𝐢𝐭𝐬 ¹Wo Geschichten leben. Entdecke jetzt