Ballad of an over thinker

He noticed

He noticed me

And I think that's the part that hurts the worst

Even though he knew I wasn't ok

He continued to play his game anyways

King will always win against pawn

And I am always the pawn

Never making it to the status of queen

I forever can only get lost in my dreams

Of him noticing my hands

Noticing the times I play with my fingers

Or biting my lips until they bleed

And get lost in the monstrosity of my head

He knew

But he continued to let it be

Because he knew that he didn't actually want me

He wanted my body

And the games that came with it

The bed

The car

The feelings never went too far

Because I was just used for empty spaces

That he couldn't fill

Even if it wasn't always along with my will

It broke my heart

To see him cry

The day that I said goodbye

But i knew that it was for the best

Because my life would always be a pest

So even after I knew that he knew

It hurt me more than I thought could be true

You broke my heart

A million times

Because you never really wanted to be mine