she ra X Reader Oneshots

deer reader x perfuma(???)

Not sure why I made this, but suffer

Y/n pov:

I woke up from my slumber, and for some reason, I was in some kind of city, instead of the forest that I live in near plumeria.

Deciding to explore this new setting, I walked passed the dragon, and into the road. Little did I Know, I would run into an all too familiar foe...

???:鹿くん、私から無事だと思いましたか？

Y/n: I don't have Google translate, can you switch to dubbed?

???: Oh sorry. HA! Did you think you were safe from me?

Oh no! My greatest enemy, truck Kun!

He started barreling down the road, ready to turn me into an anime protagonist, but luckily for me...

He forgot to turn his headlights on! I quickly sidestepped forward, forgetting that that was the direction that he was in, then got smacked all the way to down town.

Thankfully, I survived that encounter and I could prance around a field another day. Deciding that I didn't want to go around defenseless, I picked up the pistol that was on the ground for some reason, and put them where my antlers would be. Well, at least I know what country I'm in.

Now that I was packing heat, I decided to explore once more. The city was strange, to say the least. There were cows beating a homeless man to death, an elephant flying using it's ears, an ominous island surrounded by fog past the coastline and a pagoda in the distance.

At least the community was caring, as I saw people giving each other flu shots underneath a bridge.

Seeing all the chaos around me, I knew what I had to do: assert my dominance.

Since I had a gun, I decided to shoot some random person to see if anyone would react.

It took like five shots, but no one really cared. I decided to try again, but on some albino guy instead. The second I aimed the gun though, I started hearing sirens from the distance.

Several trap doors opened around the city, revealing sheep with batons in their...hands? They started chasing after me, and I began to flee.

After some running, I found some building with a sign that said "police".
After further inspection, I saw several automatic weapons in the parking lot, and I of course taped all of them to my body.

The sheep then caught up to me, ready to kill me at a moments notice.
Knowing that deer with firearms are the natural predators to sheep, I lined up all of the guns,  lit a cigar and put some sunglasses on, then I proceeded to gun down the sheep.

After several minutes of unloading bullets into them, I had came out victorious, until I noticed a car with red and blue lights on top of if that was heading straight for me.

As the car came to a stop in front of me, it began to life into the air, revealing a polar bear underneath the car. Knowing that polar bears are the natural predators of deer, I took this threat far more seriously than with the sheep.

The polar bear swung its massive claws at me, narrowly missing and taking a few hairs off of my back.

As it swung at me once more, I ducked under its massive arm and began shooting at it. After repeating this process several times, I came out victorious once more.

Feeling accomplished of myself, I stared at my kill proudly, before my deer senses kicked in. Everything felt like it was in slow motion, and I saw several bullets fly towards me. I quickly did a backflip, making the first bullet miss, then I did a twirl mid air to make the other two bullets miss by only a few inches.