Baby, I'm Gonna Leave You (SQ to Heaven's Door)

4: Falling in Love

Izzy was true to his word. Within twenty minutes, he was opening the unlocked front door. He found me, giving me a tight hug for just a second too long. "Where's Slash?" He asked. "And what's Axl doing?"

"Axl's drunk. He's with Duff." Izzy clicked his tongue in an passive-aggressive fury. "And Slash is in the bathroom. I don't know if he's throwing up or passing out."

"You shouldn't have to deal with him." Izzy shook his head. He started letting me lead him to the bathroom. "I'll have to talk with him later."

"I don't mind," I sighed. "I wish Axl would let me take care of him." The guitarist gave me a look. "What?"

"You're not-" he didn't finish the sentence. I wished that he would've. I didn't know what he was going to say. The door to the bathroom flew open. Slash was lying on the floor. His hair was plastered to his sweaty forehead, and he looked half-dead. The only assurance that he was still alive was the small movements in his chest from the breaths he was taking. "We should get him into a bed."

"We should bathe him first," I suggested. Izzy gave me a strange look. "It's the right thing to do."

"I haven't seen Slash naked yet, and I'd like to keep it that way. What would Axl think of you if he knew that you wanted to bathe another man?"

"Axl isn't here right now. And he lied to me." I looked away, blinking harshly. "We need to get Slash cleaned up before he can sleep in a bed."

Izzy sighed. "Alright, fine. But we keep this a secret. We never speak of this again, understand?" Both of us looked at Slash. "This feels so wrong." He bent down, reaching to pull of Slash's shoes. I started from the top half. The hat, the jewelry, the shirt. Izzy worked the rest of his sticky clothes off. 

I went to the bathtub, starting to fill it up with water. "I should've started to do this before," I whispered to myself. Izzy and I watched as the water began to crawl up the sides of the tub, spreading out to fill the space. "Thank you."

"You shouldn't have to thank me. I'm sorry someone like you got caught up in our flaming shitshow of a world."

"It's Axl's world. I love Axl," I explained it almost sadly. It did make me sad. I could be in Heaven right now, and while this is the world I chose, sometimes I struggled to find the balance between right and wrong here. "I wouldn't trade this life for anything if it means I get to be with him."

Izzy moved towards Slash. "You really love him, don't you?" I didn't respond before we were picking up the unconscious man and putting him into the bathtub. That was the easy part. Cleaning him up, that part was difficult. Even though Izzy had insisted I not, I did end up touching Slash all over. What choice did I have? He needed to be cleaned up.

It's what Axl would've wanted, I'm sure of it. 

&&&&&

Izzy and I sat in front of the television, MTV playing. "You don't have to stay," I told him.

"I want to," He assured me.

"What were you calling about? You never did tell me?"

"I was wondering if you knew where Axl was. I've been trying to reach him all day." Izzy sat back. "But now that I do know, I guess I was stupid to not."

I looked at my hands. "I wish he was here with me."

"I'll kick his ass for you."

"Please don't!" I looked at him nervously. "I really don't want you to hurt him." Izzy shrugged in response, not saying anything more. 

The front door opened. "Angel-face!" Axl called. "I'm back." He sounded drunk. "Where are you?" He called again.

"In the living room!" I replied. I heard a vase break as he came back. He saw me and Izzy, and his expression hardened.

"What's this guy doing here?"

"Taking care of a mess," Izzy explained, standing up. "And I'll be going now."

"Slash was sick," I explained. "So, we gave him a place to stay for a bit. He's sleeping in one of the rooms right now." I pointed upstairs. Axl sighed. "Thanks again, Izzy." The guitarist waved at me, already disappearing to leave to house. 

Axl glared at me. "Why the fuck did you invite him over here?" He spat.

"He invited himself. And at least he was around for me." I crossed my arms. "What you did wasn't cool, Axl. You can't disappear to go drinking in the middle of the day when people are on the verge of death!"

Axl rubbed his temples. "This is exactly why I didn't want you around Slash. He's a bad influence. He's in a dark fucking place right now."

"Why aren't you telling me any of these things? You aren't supposed to be keeping secrets from me."

"You don't need to know any of those things. It's not your job to worry about anyone in the band."

"And what about you? You're just as bad! And lying about where you are?"

Axl sighed. "You're right, you're right. I should've just told you what I was doing." He opened his arms. "C'mere. I'll help you take care of Slash, okay?"

"You change your mood too much," I sighed.

"You'll get used to it eventually." He pulled me into a hug, kissing the top of my head. "Anything to keep you from leaving me." My heart skipped a beat. Even now, the threat of losing him scared me.