wanderlust ☆ n.longbottom

.:28:.

Christmas was drawing near and excitement hung in the air like the baubles on the gigantic pine tree in the Great Hall. For the other years, classes had started to fade in pressure as everyone prepared to relax for the holidays. The fifth years, on the other hand, were still being bombarded with work until they were snowed under with homework assignments before the holidays even started.

It was a couple of days before the term ended and classes had seized for the week. Currently, the majority of pupils were crammed into the Great Hall for breakfast. A cacophony of chatter and plates clattering filled the beautifully decorated hall. The volume decreased slightly as the owls soared into the room, weighed down by letters and packages. They elegantly dropped them infront of the recipient and disappeared.

Vivienne swallowed. Her stone grey owl, who stood grotesquely at the end of the Slytherin table like a gargoyle, dropped a letter infront of her. She recognised the neat, swirled writing instantly as belonging to her grandmother. She picked up the yellowing envelope with shakey hands. Before opening it, she looked around the room with the air of someone anxious not to be interrupted. It read:

Vivienne,

There are matters we need to deal with here. You are not required. Stay at Hogwarts. You will be safe.

The parchment curled between Vivienne's fist. Her grandmother couldn't even be bothered to add any notes of affection into her letter, or even sign it off. She tossed it across the table, signalling for her owl to swoop in and take it away.

"Who's it by?" enquired Velma, more out of curiosity than concern.

"Just home," Vivienne sniffed in a strained voice. "Have to stay here for Christmas."

"Why?"

"The family has some business to attend to." Vivienne glanced at Draco, who was receiving a similar letter from his family. Most likely they were connected. The dark lord required servicing, even throughout Christmas.

Vivienne slumped over. Though her mother was involved with the dark lord, she was mainly doing so because she was pressured by the rest of her pure blood family. Mrs Truro was the only person who really showed Vivienne any attention. When she passed away, she was of course devastated. Veronica sympathised with her and took her under her wing. But now she was gone too.

She did have Neville. But getting involved with him and the DA would put her in serious danger if her family ever found out. It was easier to distract herself before but now the situation was escalating. She had to start being truthful. She had to pick a side.

Meanwhile, things were quiet but tense between Neville and Daisy over on the Gryffindor table. It wasn't too awkward since the duo were also accompanied by Hermione, who was studying.

"Listen, Neville, I've been thinking about Christmas and I think I should stay here instead of burdening you and your Grandmother."

Neville was shocked at Daisy's suggestion. "What?"

"Things have been....strained between us and I don't want to be intruding on your Christmas."

"You wouldn't be. Daisy, I really want you to stay with us. My parents love seeing you."

"Neville," Daisy spoke softly. "They don't remember their own name's, they're going to be fine with me not being there."

"I love you being there."

Love. Love. Love. Daisy's heart blossomed and butterflies soared in her stomach. She opened her mouth to spill out the truth but she couldn't form the words. "Your granny sure doesn't love me being there."

Neville threw back his head and laughed. "She likes you more than she lets on. Please come home with me for Christmas? You can't stay here on your own."

"I won't be on my own. I love spending time with Umbridge."

"Oh yeah, I forgot she would be staying. That's it, I'm not leaving you with her."

Daisy bit her lip. The truth was she wanted to be on her own. She hoped the time away from Neville would help her establish her feelings and hopefully get over them. But distance made the heart grow fonder. She was lost in her thoughts and vaguely heard Neville mutter something about needing to see Vivienne.

She tried not to look at Vivienne and Neville together but she couldn't help it. Her eyes found them like a moth to a flame. She seethed at their closeness. They had their backs to her and their shoulders were touching. Daisy couldn't see that Vivienne was crying, which was why Neville was attending to her.

He had his arm around her now and was practically begging for her to tell him what was wrong. The blonde sniffed and insisted she was okay. She wanted to tell him. Neville had a strange, calming aroma that always made her feel better. He always listened and gave her advice. But this problem was insurmountable for Neville to handle. She hated herself for not being completely honest, but there were some secrets Vivienne buried deep within her that would chill him to the bone if he ever found out. Being involved would put him at risk and Vivienne wanted to protect him. She also knew it would be a challenge, for even someone as kind and empathic as Neville, to not judge her for her family's connections and beliefs. She was an iceberg and that's how she wanted it to stay. But she knew deep down that the iceberg was starting to melt, slowly but surely, like the tide coming into the shore. It must happen eventually and there's nothing that can stop it.

She loved pretending to be an ordinary teenage girl falling in love with an ordinary teenage boy. It was simple but it was blissful. She was acting, as though she were starring a movie, but she knew that the movie couldn't last forever. It had to come to an end one way or another.

Neville had made her feel safe and secure. He felt like home to her. He helped her be a better person and made her feel brave enough to question her family. Was she really considering sacrificing her whole life for a boy?

She couldn't. When the war begins, she wanted to make sure she was on the triumphant side - good or bad. Her own opinions didn't matter. Her feelings for a boy didn't matter. Her family was what would protect her in the end. A few teenagers teaching themselves spells could not offer her the same security.

She had to end things with him before it got too late...but she wasn't strong enough just yet. She wanted to keep pretending, just a little bit longer...