Jeon Heejin's POV
I went home after walking Gaeul home, and I was welcomed by a heartbreaking scene. Damn. I can't really get a rest, no?
There's Hyeol and Hyunjin kissing on the couch. I stood there, looking at them.
I then realized how stupid I probably looked and went back outside. I don't want to disturb their moment together.
I shoved my hands inside the pockets of my skirt and decided to go somewhere instead.
I feel so worn out right now.
Mom... Then that.
God...
I heaved a sigh.
Maybe mom's right. Hwihyeol's better than me. In everything, in any aspect. Maybe that's why she's the favorite, and maybe that's why Hyunjin chose her too.
We exactly look like each other, but people always find her better than me. In academics, in basketball...
This is tiring me even more.
I'm nothing compared to Hwihyeol. That's what my dad said, and I'm starting to think the same.
I harshly sigh and take out a packet of cigarettes from my hoodie pocket. I put a stick between my lips and lit it up. Taking a puff, I blew the smoke out of my mouth. It helped me calm down.
I don't really smoke as much as I can, but this is the only way I can stop myself from overthinking.
I take my phone out of my pocket and call someone.
"Hey, where are you?" I spoke.
"At home, why?" Chaewon said.
"Wait, are you smoking?" maybe she heard the sound of me taking a puff from the cigar.
"Yeah," I answered, blowing out the smoke.
"Is everything alright, Two? Do you want me to come over? " I know she tried so hard to hide it, but she sounded so worried.
"Can I come over instead?" I asked her.
"Sure, I'll leave the door open, buddy."
"Thanks, Chae."
I hung up the phone and made my way to Chaewon's house. She's usually alone in their house, so I chose to call her.
It wasn't that far, and I reached it in about 20 minutes, I think.
I turned the knob, and she really left the door unlocked. I get inside, lock the door behind me, and take off my shoes before heading upstairs to her room.
I knocked and went inside after hearing a muffled 'come in'.
"I thought you were hanging out with Minju again," I spoke, and she only chuckled.
I take a seat on her couch, and she stares at me.
"Go change your clothes. You can use mine, "she said, as I'm still wearing my school uniform.
I did as I was told, getting a shirt and pants from her closet, and went to the bathroom to get changed.
I went back to her room, and I saw Chaewon now sitting on her couch.
I quietly sat beside her and fiddled with the hem of her oversized shirt.
"So, what's the matter, bud? You only smoke when you're upset or something. "
I didn't look at her, nor did I answer her.
"Can I smoke?" I asked her.
"Let's do that on the balcony," she said, and I agreed.
We both sat on the two chairs on her balcony and lit up a cigarette. She doesn't really smoke. She only does it when we do.
"You know that Minju's gonna get mad, right?" I told her. She doesn't like it when her girlfriend smokes.
"My friend has a problem and I have to console her. She won't mind if this is the case, Two" she said.
"So, wanna tell me about it?"
"Mom called me this morning" I started off.
"Please, please, don't tell me it's the same shit again." she looks at me and all I can do is crack up a smile.
"Don't listen to her," my friend said.
"I'm starting to believe her, Chae," I mumbled.
"Heejin, no, you're so precious. You've told me what she said to you last time, and nothing about it is true. You're a great person, bud. You don't deserve them."
I smiled at her words. She rarely says things like this, and I appreciate what she's doing.
"I just don't understand. She carried me and Hyeol in her tummy for nine months, but how can she only care about her? I'm her daughter too. But why does she treat me differently? "
"I don't know the answer to that, as I'm not your mom, but it's on her, Two. Nothing's your fault. "
"Let's not talk about this," I said, going back to smoking.
"By the way, the reason why I am here is because I saw Hwihyeol and Hyunjin kissing on our couch."
She audibly choked on the smoke, causing me to laugh loudly.
"Fuck," she cursed, and I patted her back.
"Are you okay?" she paused, "Okay, that was a stupid question actually"
I chuckled and answer with, "Yes, but if I'm being honest, ...I'm not"
"You know, Chae, Yujin introduced me to someone and she's really nice. She's beautiful too"
"Yujin told us about it while you're at your date. It's Gaeul, isn't it?"
I nodded.
"So, how was your date?"
"It was fun. She's fun to be with. She has a sense of humour too. And she told me that maybe we should go on another date" I smiled.
"You're smiling, it's nice to see you not faking it"
"I was happy the whole time this afternoon until I walked her to her house, but it's still different when I'm with Hyunjin"
"It'll be like that in the beginning, but you'll get used to it afterwards. I think you should really give it a chance, but the decision is still yours." she gave me a smile.
"Maybe I really should," I said.
"Should we call the rest of the squad?" she asked, and I shook my head.
"I'm already too tired to deal with Ryujin's shits" I said, and she laughs.
"Thank you for giving me company for tonight, Cocoball." I mean it.
"It's my pleasure, Rabbit."
We both chuckled, and finished the stick of cigarette we were holding. Right after throwing away the butt of the cigarette, we went back inside and laid on her bed.
We told each other "good night" before going to sleep.
