/part 4/
i restarted my project on an impulse.
i have to struggle to run away, there's no answer. i wrote on my note sheet.
until the sun falls more into sleep, deeper.
my hand moved with a mind of is own. i really wanna know, i've already lost control.
i'm going crazy now, out of control
i stay up all night again
the moment when i close my eyes
all i see is red lights
i felt light-headed as memories from this morning flood back in. no, no i can't.
i ripped my notes up and shoved it in my pocket. i released a long breath.
yoongi had the audacity to accidentally bump my arm while we packed up. i winced at the burning pain under my bandages.
'oh my god, i'm so sorry, did i hit you hard?' he apologized.
'no, i'm fine' i shouldn't have said that.
'no, you're hurt, is your arm okay?' he touched my arm and it tensed immediately. my heart tensed too.
'don't touch it' i said, pushing my chair in. he followed me out the lecture hall.
'there's blood on your sleeve, did you-'
'shh!' i shush him, 'no, i didn't'
he didn't believe me, but he had to, because i told him to go. please don't leave me.
as i walked home, i felt odd. someone cared. a human cared about me.
or maybe he was just being nice.
/part 5/
the student whines on the ground of my apartment. this time, i know his face. it is min yoongi.
i want him. not just any doll sitting on my floor. it is yoongi. shiny eyes, rosy cheeks. the pretty doll in front of my eyes is as perfect as i used to be.
he is everything i'm not.
nice, caring, talented, pretty, innocent.
jealousy and admiration are separated by a thin line, but there is no denying my feelings.
you know i can't leave you alone.
distress shook me up, eyes dry and limbs stiff again. my desire for him was too real.
another thing that was separated by a thin line was love and hate.
i imagined yoongi on my bedroom floor just like in the dream. he could be all to myself. make him feel my love and no one would ever know. i scolded myself, why am i so selfish?
yoongi, the perfect version of myself. should i love or hate him? be jealous of or admire him?
i couldn't do it again. but i wanted to.
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RED LIGHTS // yoonkook
Fanfiction"come over closer, hold me tight" jungkook, a longtime psychopathic killer was finally trying to settle back into society. he was still unstable, suicidal, and bitter. even when a cute boy he crossed paths with became the most caring person he has e...
