XII. Things Dont Go As Planned But End Up Fine, Part Three

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We stay in the lake talking for a long time, shivering and huddling closer to each other. Edmund tells me his story, the one of Turkish delight and manipulation and betrayal. If anything, it makes me feel even worse. I know it isn't comparable to my life or my actions, but in a way I am doing something similar to Peter.

Flirting with him in an act to make Edmund jealous, even though I don't really like him and I know I'll be out of here soon. After I leave, will they pretend like none of this happened? Like I was never in Narnia to begin with? Or will there always be a rift between the two brothers? One that I caused?

After Edmund finishes his story, we're so close to each other I can feel his breath on my face. "So...that's it." he says when he's done, eyes avoiding mine.

"Well, at least you redeemed yourself, obviously." I whisper. "No one thinks you're a traitor anymore."

"I guess so." He frowns.

"What?"

"I just—no, it's stupid. Never mind." He turns his head a little.

"Tell me." I insist and he looks back at me, finally relenting.

"I feel like they still resent me for it, you know?" He pauses and sighs, "I mean, it's really stupid, and deep down I know that they don't actually it's just—I feel bad about it. Like I still have to constantly prove myself and like I'll always be...less than Peter."

"What?" I furrow my brow.

"He's the high king, and I'm just...the king. I'm grateful for it, don't get me wrong, I just wish that people would...sorry. I'm talking too much. I mean, you obviously think he's great, too. I don't know why I'm even saying all of this." Edmund is looking down at the rippling water, frowning. His insecure words hit me like a wave of sadness, and I feel like crying for a second time that night. I never meant to make him feel like less-than,  I just wanted to make him jealous.

"I—" I begin, but realize I don't even know what to say that could possibly put my feelings into words. I need to get out of this freezing cold lake and stop thinking about it.

"I shouldn't have said that." He pinches the bridge of his nose and sighs, "I just started talking and I couldn't stop and—" He trails off as I pull myself out of the lake and onto the grass, "Are you mad at me?"

"No!" I say too quickly, "I'm just—cold." I stand up and wrap my arms around myself. He pulls himself out and stands up next to me. I feel so terrible. "Edmund, I—" Again, I find myself at a loss for words.

So I turn and wrap my arms around his bare shoulders, and his hesitantly wrap around my waist.

"You're not less than Peter. I promise." It feels weird being so vulnerable with him. I'm used to emotionally-detached sarcastic remarks, constantly chiding each other. This is different. We stay quiet for a second, and our skin is touching, and I've never been this cold.

"Wait." Edmund suddenly pulls away, "You're not wearing an bandages."

Really? That's what he wants to talk about right now?

"Yeah, well, you weren't back when I got out of the shower last night and I can't do it myself so..."

"Well why didn't you tell me when I got back?"

"I was tired!" I grin at his flustered state.

"It's going to get infected!" We're half-laughing-half-arguing at this point. The two of us sigh and pick up our clothes from the ground. The walk back to the tents is cold and uncomfortable, and when we make it I grab as many blankets as I can and wrap them around me

 𝙗𝙚𝙩𝙧𝙤𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙙 (edmund pevensie x reader)Where stories live. Discover now