Monster or Angel - Alec Lightwood

16 - Family Field Trip

As soon as I get back to the Institute I write up the mission report. I have tried to stay away from everyone, and I have done a good job so far. But I know as soon as I write my final word I'll be needing to find Alec to tell him I'm back and that the job is done. I've been going over in my mind how to be friends with him. I want him in my life, and like Simon said, that means I have to put my feelings aside. I can do that, I'm a Shadowhunter. We're trained to push emotions away and so I know I can do it. 

I finish my report and send it to Alec. I take a deep breath before pushing myself out of my chair, making my way towards his office... or I guess, Lydia's office. I take another small breath as I reach the door and I knock before I can over think everything. 

"Come in," Alec's voice calls. I open the door and walk in giving Lydia a once over before giving Alec my undivided attention. He may look beautiful right now, but I am going to ignore it. 

"Mission finished and I've sent you the report," I say trying to make my voice seem as though I'm not trying too hard to be normal. I know Alec can see right through it though by the way he quirks his brow at me. Lydia moves towards the computer and frowns as she looks from the screen to me. 

"I don't see it here," she says and I give her a smile, not a malicious one... I don't think anyway. 

"That's because I sent it to Alec. He was the one to send me on mission," I say, not glancing to her. Alec's mouth twitches at the corners and I count that as a small win. Maybe I can be his friend and nothing more. 

"Thank you, Maelys," Alec says and I shrug it off. 

"It's the job, is it not? If you haven't got another mission, I'll be leaving." Before I have a chance to turn and leave Alec is walking towards me. 

"We're finished in here, I'll walk with you," he says. I clench my jaw and take a small breath to push my feelings down. I give him a nod and begin to walk out. 

"Alec," Lydia huffs. I guess she wasn't finished with whatever they were talking about. I leave the room quickly heading back towards the ops centre and Alec and Lydia are close to follow, Alec moving to my side.

"Why did you not return with Clary?" Alec asks as we turn a corner. A small laugh slips out my mouth and I shake my head. 

"Because I was stupid to take her with me. The mission ended with me telling her that I'm looking for a reason to kill her," I say which makes him laugh. I smile at his laugh and I catch Lydia staring at me. 

"You're trying to kill a fellow Shadowhunter? Is there something I should know about Clary Fairchild?" Lydia asks and I roll my eyes. 

"She isn't going to kill her," Alec says to calm his soon-to-be bride.

"I did try to kill her," I say glancing past Alec to meet Lydia's eye, "Unfortunately I missed." Her eyes widen in shock. I turn away from her as we enter the ops centre and I find myself drawing towards the side where I spy Magnus. 

"She's just kidding." I hear Alec say in my defence to Lydia. I ignore everything else they say to each other when I notice that Magnus is standing with Jace, Hodge and Clary. I have two options here. I could go and see what's happening; it's obviously something important if both Magnus and Hodge are needing to be involved. Or, and it's the option I'm favouring, I could turn around and walk away. Alec and Lydia walk past me, and I use their presence to shield me, allowing me to slip away undetected. 

"Magnus, I didn't know you were here," Lydia says. I'm almost out of sight when I'm called back. 

"Peanut, just the person I'd hoped would join us." I curse internally for not leaving quick enough. I turn around to see Magnus walking to me, him kissing my cheek in a caring and friendly way before returning his attention to the others. I stick close to Magnus' side, deciding to not meet everyone's gaze.