His Doubtful Promises

Chapter 4

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His hand remained intertwined with mine, his scent still lingered and the dazzling moon shining above us made the moment more surreal. Everyone else still continued playing, but I got so distracted ever since Nycho started holding my hand.

Well, not until the bottle landed on Nycho and it was his turn to choose. I smirked and moved my face closer to his but he didn't back down, he never does. We stared at each other before I could even ask my question. I let go of his hand and did my best to think of a great question.

"Are you scared of commitment?" I asked, and the others all grew silent. It made me think too, it made us all think. Nycho was slowly taken aback, he drank the rest of his beer before answering. I couldn't wait to hear his answer. Hoping there's wisdom in it, just like how he talked to me earlier at the mini bar.

"Scared? No. Yet even if I'm not scared of commitment, that doesn't mean I would actually jump to that. I just don't see myself putting a label on anything, I'm not that kind of person. I won't last long. For me, as long as we're happy, our mutual understandings and emotional set-up is enough. I just want someone who shares the same perception as me."

Upon hearing that, I cannot explain why I suddenly felt a sting in my heart. Hearing that made me scared, I looked into what would happen if I continue getting to know him, and I know I'd fall hard. With how he looks at me, how he talks to me and how he makes me feel. I just know I'd fall hard.

I'm not scared of falling in love, but it's not the same knowing there's a possibility I might fall for someone like Nycho, or even Nycho himself. If only I could stop my feelings from developing and if only I could decide for my heart, I would. But it's already happening, and there's no turning back. No matter how hard I try to deny it, I know deep down I'm already falling.

I looked at Nycho with a small smile on my face, I didn't know what to say and everyone was just silent, waiting for him to add anything else with what he already said. I looked at Rox and I could see sadness in her eyes, I know she's thinking a lot about what Nycho said, maybe putting it in her situation with Kor.

Nycho carried on... "And because of that, I don't trust myself with other people's feelings. Yes, I admit it, the longer you'd know me... I slowly turn into a huge jerk. I'm not scared of commitment, but I don't see myself committing."

"What the fuck man..." Kyve shook his head while looking at Nycho. I looked at him too, feeling a slight pain in my chest because of what he said. Now, I'm overthinking, and scared of the outcome
if ever things escalate into something more.

"It's because he's drunk." Gaeb says while shaking his head, while picking up the empty cans that Nycho left on the sand. "Let's play another game. Never have I ever?"

We played a few rounds of the game before settling down and then a staff came to us with wine. When everyone was finally given their share, I looked at Nycho as he continuously drank. He looked fine, but I know deep inside he's also thinking about what he said earlier.

"Cheers, to the beginning of a wonderful friendship!" He starts off. "...In a few days, all of you would go home. I'll stay here in Siargao, since I live here. But, I would find a way to visit all of you there. Especially now that I met someone worth the effort." He stared at me.

My eyes widened, was that final message for me?! I didn't want to assume anything because I'm scared I might get my hopes up for nothing. I just gave him a smile, not making it obvious that he touched my heart with what he said. What is he doing to me?! I thought I was just interested and now I wanted to know more, beyond my boundaries, the boundaries that I've set for myself.