His Doubtful Promises

Chapter 20

For Chapter 20, play One Last Cry — Brian McKnight as background music. Video is provided above, credits to the owners.

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"I will not let her tear us apart. I will not let this engagement get in the way, I will end this. It will end with us Vry. I would rather spend a lifetime with you, even if it's uncertain. As long as it's with you, I would set things straight."

It feels like a lifetime is not worth living without him in it, somehow, all I ever cared about was having him in my life... and I was so wrong to think that. His promises were all doubtful, every bit of them was filled with lies and all it ever gave me was the feeling of disappointment. Maybe I was blinded with words. His words.

Months passed, within those months he kept promising. Telling me to wait patiently for everything to be fixed, he kept pushing his luck, pushing his mother to call the engagement off. For months I also pushed myself to believe in him, every single day I would try my best to give him a chance.

Even if it seemed so helpless...

Not a day would go by that I wouldn't look up and ask for signs, I would constantly pray and seek for amelioration when it comes to my decision. Waiting for him made me feel so much exhaust and he gave me more doubts. But I kept my trust in his words, because he promised... and he promised to keep his promises this time. He promised to not break them this time.

"Vry..." Rox was about to speak when she stopped to grab the bowl of chips on the table. She's here with Amee and Ven, Theia isn't here because she's busy. "Did you seriously believe in Nycho again? Come on, for once just please spare yourself."

"Savelle is right Vry, you can't keep on waiting for your entire life. Think of the possibilities and think of the greater things that's there for you." I could hear Venylie say all of those, but none of them could ever push me to stop. "Your life won't stop if you lose him, the world won't wait for you Vry, the world will never wait for you and you should stop waiting for someone like him."

But he promised... he swore almost everyday to fill those promises, to not break them. In doubt or not, I couldn't stop myself from believing in him and maybe I can't because I got used to hearing words like those even if they already appear hollow for him. I still believed, even if they seem empty...

I looked at all them, doe-eyed and with my heart slowly shrieking into an oblivion, I wish it was that easy to do all of those. I hope it's not that difficult to turn my back and completely leave him, to fully choose my own peace and myself for once but it isn't. It's never easy and until now I still find it hard to just walk away.

"He's not the world Vrylle, he's not the only person that's capable of making you feel things. Don't waste your time in all of these uncertainties when there's still hope to find someone who's willing to give the world to you and not just to be your world. Start seeing yourself without him..."

"Vrylle, I know that deep down in you, you're aware that you deserve more than what he's giving you. He's not worth all this waiting and all this pain Vry! Wake up, you should start yearning for more."

I kept hearing all of those over and over again but it won't work, the words were weak to break my walls down. I loved him a little too greatly, I forgot to leave some for myself, I settled for the minimum when I should have hoped for the bigger things. But it was Nycho, I was blinded by him, his promises were too great for me to forget.

In the end... I still believed in him. I waited and waited, I kept waiting for the right time he promised me. He did it, he was finally making it, he was almost there. With all of his hard pushing and his efforts, he's finally there... he's there. He made it there. I couldn't be happier to see him make it.