Chapter 9: lessons
Kitten could only watch from the shade of a tree in amusement as Katsuki Bakugo and Shoto Todoroki tried and utterly failed to keep up with Izuku through the tests. In fact the only two where izuku didn't come first were the ball toss which he lost to Uraraka and the side jumps which he lost to Mineta. The goddess wasn't as fit as the trio of boys but she wasnt a slouch either, often comming in within the top 8 or so of most events, failing only the toe touches after she stopped to beat up Mineta and the high jump as she wasn't build for it or had wings.
At the end of the grueling 3 hours of tests Aizawa finally started to tally up the resaults for the students. Naturally it was rather predictable. Izuku came in first, then Bakugo, Todoroki, Yaomomo, Tenya Iida and waaay down in last place was Mineta. Said purple haired boy was sobbing on his knees, snot running down his face as he cried about not getting his own harem, this just disgusted the students, especially the fact he tried to use Kaminari's pants to wipe away the snot.
"Gross." Kitten irked in disgust as the students backed away from the short teen.
"And why are you here?" Aizawa asked bluntly and in irritation, his eyes were starting to sting from not blinking as he repeatedly tried to nullify Izuku and Mina's powers to no effect.
"Well I was told to get a job here by Inko and Nezu hired me as a training instructor." The Custode admitted. "I got here about half way through the first test while Todoroki was running."
"Shit." Mina uttered as her knees gave out and she collapsed. " Training by a custode? I'm not sure my physical form will stay co...coh...whats the word that means stuck together?"
"Coherant?" Yaomomo asked as the pink goddess nodded with a thumbs up.
"Yeah that. Even being near that stupid blessed armor is giving me a headache."
"Oh come on, it's not that bad, At least Magnus says so." Kitten rebutted.
"And Magnus put up with Tzeench for how long again?" Izuku asked with a raised eyebrow. "I mean, it's basically him being used to more headaches caused by non Euclidean geometry. Hold on, does that mean...mutter...mutter mutter...mutter...mutter..."
"Fucking nerd." Bakugo scoffed.
"Yup." Mina snorted but quickly scooted away as Kitten took a few paces closer.
"Anyway, while I did see the majority of your tests I will ask who here can actually fight?" Kitten asked the students.
Less than a quarter of the class did. Those being Ojiro, Izuku, Mina, Kyoka and Bakugo. Kitten only sighed with a shake of his head at the low number before taking out a small note book and began to scribble down a few things.
"Midoriya and Mina, Bakugo and Ojiro and Mina and Kyoko, I want you to study your partner's fighting style and find at least 3 flaws in it and how to exploit it. The rest of you, research a common fighting style and how you could beat it using your quirks. I expect this done within 4 days."
"You heard them. Your first assignment is in 4 days, fail to hand in a paper and you're serving detention for a month." Aizawa threatened bluntly making the students gulp nervously before the teacher rounded on Mineta.
"You're all free to go, Mineta you're expelled so don't bother coming in tomorrow."
[At the same time with the Hisashi]
The god emperor could only mentally shake his head at what he was seeing. The pillarstodes had gotten it in their heads to invite santones into the throne room and they had busted out the oil barrels.
:WHY IN THE EVER LOVING FUCK DID I HIRE YOU FOUR AGAIN?: He asked, disappointment in his past self evident.
"Well I think I just cut to the front of the line." One admitted.
"FOR MY SMOOTH, CHIZZLED, WELL OILED ABS AND MASSIVE BULGING MUSSLES." Santones replied.
"What line?" Another replied as he oiled his black helmet.
"Yes we never wait in lines. I literally just said in hired and you agreed." The third stated simply.
"..."
"..."
"..."
:FUCK ALL MANNER OF WARP DUCKS:
"You mean geese?" The second custode asked.
:YOU KNOW DAMN WELL WHAT I MEAN: Hisashi raged, sending the custode flying with a psychic burst.
"Well I did always tell you father that you needed a better screening process for the custodes." Magnus stated smugly from his corner of the room.
:SHUT THE FUCK UP MAGNUS YOU GIANT NERD.:
"I'M NOT A NERD!" Magnus snapped irritabilly as he scrunched the pieces of paper in his fists. " Now look what you made me do! Now I have to go and start the taxes all over again."
"WHAT...ARE TAXES?" Santones asked.
:I AM WITH SANTONES ON THIS ONE, WHAT TAXES I AM THE ME DAMNED EMPEROR PEOPLE PAY TAXES TO ME.: Hisashi stated bluntly as he waited for Magnus to finish sighing.
"Yes normally that is true but the old geezers in charge of everything have started charging an air tax for breathing, a...old...man tax" Magnus stated squinting at the page. " And a resident tax, so I'm stuck here sorting out this entire mess for all ten thousand custodes, plus staff, maintainance, administration, myself and you."
:FUCK.:
"Yes and now I have to start all over again or those old wind bags will charge us a late fee and a late tax tax and a late tax tax delivery tax." Magnus seethed in annoyance. "I swear it was much easier dealing with Tzeench's dickery rather than this."
:HEY, MAGNUS:
"Yes?" Magnus sighed in exasperation.
:KNOCK KNOCK:
"Who's there?" He gritted
:NOT YOUR LEFT EYE: Hisashi replied.
"THAT WAS UNCALLED FOR FATHER!"
:LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL!:
"And you wonder why half of us joined chaos." Magnus scoffed before going back to the taxes.
"Awekward." The custodes sang.
"Oh shut up!" Magnus grunted in annoyance.
End
YOU ARE READING
BNHA TTS
FanfictionIzuku's father is the God Emperor, his mother is a godlike psycher and his nanny is Kitten, how will the heroes keep up with the young primarch? some Pairings to be decided. unofficial of GW.
