He doesn't know
He doesn't know the way I'd used to watch him sleep, the gentle rise and fall of his breaths my only relief.
He doesn't know the way I'd pray for him everyday, he doesn't know the pain I was in until he was home again.
How could he know? I never voiced my concerns. How could he know if he never watched my eyes burn?
He'd never know my pain, he'd never see my fears. I'd never let him know, just how badly I needed him near, for he was never mine to keep. Only mine for relief.
He had another place to go, another place to call home. He was never mine for long, only mine when something had gone wrong.
I should have known better then to invest myself in when he had another lover, but how could I have known when he never let me meet her.
