𝒓𝒐𝒃𝒃𝒆𝒓𝒔 - m.h

// t w e l v e //

chapter song: favorite crime - olivia rodrigo

it's been two days since that robbery heist we had made and the mess we had caused, the cops and authorities were still looking out for us. and if you're wondering how i was surviving, or where am i getting my source of food...well about that, i disguise myself when i go outside and spend my remaining money on me for cheap foods that i can afford with my limited money. it was working quite well, no one recognized me except for that one time where someone nearly did but couldn't pinpoint where she had saw me, and i was glad that she forgot or else i'm fucking doomed.

and also, i haven't heard from them—or about him, they haven't been tracked down yet. the guys must be enjoying that big of a treasure a lot, probably living their best life with the money we had stole, spent it over drugs and alcohol like they usually do. i was bitter about it, not because they were the only ones who got to enjoy the sweet taste of victory, i did not care about the money, what i was bitter for is they are enjoying while i'm out here suffering—the worst thing is i was alone. i have no one.

i walked around the streets of taft, of course, i have my disguise mode on, and i bet i look unrecognizable. no one had known who i was—so far—and it was going pretty good, i was traveling my eyes around the surroundings and later on felt a person's chest bumped into me, i quickly backed away and apologized. "i'm so sorry." i was rushing out and walked away, didn't even bother to hear or wait the person's reply and continued to move my feet away from him.

if you're wondering what happened to my suicide attempt...well you already know what happened; it failed.

it was starting to get hard to breathe, my chest was heavy and felt like my lungs were blocked by something. i can feel my consciousness fading, but a loud ringing in my ear was heard causing me to open my eyes out of instinct, my head immediately went above water. my attempt was disturbed, i did not make it to the darkness, i got out the tub and almost slipped because of the water that was coming from my dripping wet hair and soaked clothing, the water was overflowing; the faucet was still on.

i reached my hand out and turned it off, unplugged the tap of the drain to suck all the water. i stood in front of the mirror and stared at my reflection, "you can't do it." i mumbled under my breath, i felt a sense of disappointment because the thing i wanted to do did not happened, it's all because of that stupid ringing. but the feeling of the difficulty in breathing and grasping for air was scary, the feeling of dying...was scary.

i was vexed when someone accidentally hit my arm with her phone, "ouch" i murmured as i brushed my palm against the area and looked back at that person, she did not apologized. it's fine, no hard feelings. i sidled as a lot of people started to come my way, i was fitting in just to make my way out the crowd, a lot of them were rushing too. the back of my hand glided across someone else's, and it felt morose and chill, god did that hand came straight out of the freezer? it was freaking cold.

as i was walking, i saw two cops that were standing on the sidewalk just a few feet away from where i was standing, i suddenly felt anxious on walking past by them without having to be so suspicious. i stopped on my track and whirled around, should i cross the road to avoid them? but it'll take me too long to be able to go to the other side, there were a lot of vehicles on the road. and i need to get out quickly, i was gonna head somewhere i can ask for help.

after what feels like a long time of thinking about what to do, i decided to walk past by and just play it cool. i fixed my scarf that was wrapped around my neck and was covering half of my face and fixed my sunglasses in place, "you got this, just don't be suspicious." i motivated myself and took a deep breath before walked with slight speed, exaggerated arm and leg movement as i slowly approached their way.