Down The Highway

Chapter Forty-Six

While looking at his eyes, he smiled and sat next to me on the long chair while I found the three girls smiling while watching me roll my eyes from them. I sighed. Seriously, I don't want to talk to him. I can manage to be with the girls who I just argued with yesterday but not with him.

He knows how to let out the worst in me. He makes me cry without even trying to. Just by thinking that he easily forgot about the old us, I feel uncomfortable. It makes me wonder how he forgot about things that easily. Did he turn a light switch on and off to forget and remember all the things when he wants to?

"I don't want to talk to you. Not know, Travis" I did my best not to look at his eyes which always captured my attention.

"So, when would we? When it's too late already? When we can't fix everything?" He gently motioned closer to me as I took a step backward to get away from him on the small chair.

"Is it not too late yet? Well sorry, but I think it is I know," he knows, God knows that I didn't mean all those words. But they already escaped out of my mouth.

"It is not yet too late if you give it a chance," he slowly sighed.

"Chance? Can you hear yourself right now? Do you even know what the word chance actually means? Well, I already gave this crap a chance. But believe me or not, it didn't work," grumpiness was obvious in my voice. No hiding nor denying that I almost cried out.

"Yes, and everything deserves a second chance am I right?"

No, you were never right.

I saw the disappointment on his face. The smile immediately got replaced by a sad face after it vanished. He began to look up at the blue cloudy sky above us but I decided to keep on staring at the bulky road where my feet were hanging onto.

Nonetheless, I took a glance at him while he was silently staring at the sky. Why do I have to be the one to meet him in my life? It could be Jannet, or Myrna, or Maureen, or people who I don't even know exists. But out of the seven billion people in the world, why does it have to be me?

If we never met, if we never encountered each other, if we never fell, if we never fell apart, or if we never collided, maybe then, everything is alright by now. But things happen unexpectedly especially when you wish for them not to happen.

I always wished that we would never meet again. I wish I never did because now, it's coming true. Good things we wish to come true never do. But the bad ones always do. Like this one. I and Travis is a bad idea. "What are you staring at?" He asked after noticing me staring at him for at least thirty seconds. "A big mistake," I said grumpily. He finally glances back at me saying, "I'm with the sinner of the big mistake" I sighed after those words he pronounced. On the other hand, he is pretty right.

When he came back, I should have just ignored him like what he did to me. But I still looked for trouble when I chased him when I know I should have not. "I have a question," out of the blue, I decided to change the topic and lend it to him.

"Go ahead," he looks again at me.

"Why did you choose to forget me rather than to always keep me in your mind like what I did?" I inquired.

"You got the answer, Jade. Open your eyes," short words, but means a lot.

"My eyes are open, but I still can't see the answer. Maybe I am not meant to see it?"  I actually do have the answers. It is just that I want those words to come from his mouth. So he could be the one to confirm it all out to me.

"I told you before," I looked around but saw nothing but a bunch of random strangers I have never met before even if we are in the same place here in London.

"I want to hear it again as much as I want you to say those words again," I am also surprised by the words I let exit from my mouth but I had no control of it.

"Because you told me to forget about you the night you figured out about Xanny and who I really am," those are the words I was craving from him. The ones I wanted my ear to hear as their therapy. Without even thinking, I found myself gently leaning to his shoulders as he let me to.

I closed my eyes for a second as I felt the cold autumn breeze blowing me away and giving me goosebumps. I heard the leaves crunching down the ground while people passed by, I can tell all those things even if my eyes are closed. "I know I shouldn't love you but..." I didn't know what to say next. My mind was empty and had nothing else to say.

Moreover, I felt his hands gently being wrapped around me. He slowly rubs my back and it feels as good as a massage that I never had before in my entire two-decade existence on earth."You shouldn't say that you shouldn't love me. Because love is a rule-less game. Just like a rule-less game, it's up to you how you would play it. We are the ones to set rules in love and my rules, nothing is not meant to be."

His words hit deep in me deeper than I know they should have. But I know that he isn't much right. Because I have Dylan who I know would be hurt if he knows all the things I feel for Travis.

This place is about to explode in a few seconds.

My eyes widened after I opened them. But on the other side, I was trying not to believe what my eyes saw. Dylan was standing in front of the churros food store stall where the girls went earlier. He was staring at me with an o sign formed through his mouth.