A Mom in Middle School

I Can't Deal

I held my breath, my stomach fluttering with excitement as Ella-Mae said, "Opal."

Opal.

Opal?

Eww! Barf. That's so ugly!

I tried to hide my expression, but I could tell by the looks on Ella-Mae and Jake's faces that it was far, far too late. All I was thinking at the time was how ugly the name was and how much I hated it. It didn't even occur to me that I was flat-out, completely insulting them. I would definitely go back in time and react differently, but it's too late for that now.

"Opal was my grandmother's name. She was a Holocaust survivor," said Ella-Mae, a slight edge to her voice.

I sunk a lot deeper into the seat of the booth. I was so embarrassed that I debated going all the way under the table, crawling out of there, and finding a different family to adopt my baby. A family that wasn't going to name her Opal. It sounded like a name for a little old lady. I imagined my baby girl a lot, wearing bows on her head and having my red hair. She was going to be adorable. Nothing about an Opal seemed adorable.

"She had no way of knowing that, Ella," said Jake.

"I understand that it's not a common name, but in our contract you said that we can name the baby. This is the name we're choosing for her," said Ella-Mae.

"I know. I get that, but—" I took a deep breath. I was in way too deep already. I figured it was just best to be honest at this point. "I'm really sorry, but I just don't like it. But I do understand that she's your baby, so you can...name her whatever you want."

"Are you sure you haven't thought about any names?" asked Ella-Mae.

"If you have anything, we could always try it out as a middle name. We don't have a middle name picked out yet," said Jake.

"We've narrowed it down to a few," said Ella-Mae. "Maybe you can help us choose the final one? That might sound a little bit better."

"Okay, sure," I said, perking up a little.

"So the names we narrowed it down to are Opal Margaret, Opal Amelia, and Opal Elise," said Ella-Mae.

"Elise! Yeah...I like Opal Elise a lot," I said.

Jake chuckled. "That didn't take you long to decide at all."

"I knew right away. My mom's name was Lisa. I've always really loved that name. I like Elise because it sounds similar."

"Then I think it's settled." I watched as Ella-Mae lit up. "Opal Elise Burgess."

"It's a great name," said Jake.

If by "great" you mean "hideous," then sure.

I guess that wasn't exactly a hundred percent true. The Elise made it a little better, but how many people would really even know that? Everyone would just refer to her by that first, yucky Opal.

I finished out my dessert with Jake and Ella-Mae. They paid, just like they promised. I debated about giving Janet back the twenty that was in my wallet. I kind of wanted to use it for something special.

"Thank you so much for meeting with us, Roslyn," Ella-Mae said to me by the door of the diner.

"We'd really like to see you again, if it's okay with you. Maybe get some ice cream when it warms up," said Jake.

"I'd like that," I said.

We said our goodbyes and parted ways. When I got into Janet's car, I instantly started breaking down the instant she asked me how it went.

"I hate it! I hate it so much! It's so ugly!" I said in between my sobs. "They want to name her Opal! That's like, the ugliest name I've ever heard!"

"Opal? That's not a bad name at all!" Janet said.

"Yes it is!"

"I understand that you don't like it, Ros, but at the end of the day, she's their baby. I know it's really hard, but—"

I sniffled. "I can't. I can't deal with this. I hate this so much."

We finished the ride home and I ran straight to my room, falling right on my bed in front of Josie. She gave me a weird look and left with her DS, closing the door behind her. I already felt like I didn't deserve to be a mom because I was so young, and this name made me feel a thousand times worse.