You're Dead to Me

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"Hold, hold on, hold onto me, 'cause I'm a little unsteady, a little unsteady"

A few days went by, and I had finally settled in, my head was hurting less and less, which told Bucky it was time to talk about what happened. I remember waking up around 10:00, mostly because I had a rough night (wink wink) and I was exhausted. Bucky was already up before me, and when I woke up, he was getting dressed.

I rubbed my eyes as I yawned, "good morning," I whispered, and Bucky turned around with a smile.

"Good morning doll face," he smiled, climbing on top of me and pressing a kiss to my lips, "how's your head?"

"It's good," I yawned, and his smile got bigger.

"Good," he whispered, "hey doll.. you're not going to like this, but we need to talk."

Immediately I knew something was up.

"What do you mean?" I asked, "is it bad?"

"We need to talk about your past baby," he whispered, and my heart dropped. "I know it's hard for you. But I think your accident was planned. Someone wants yku dead."

"Really?" I asked, and he nodded his head, "why do you think so?"

"Because you have an hourglass carved into your shoulder," he said softly, staring down at me, "and it doesn't have to be with everyone, but I need you to talk to me. Okay?"

"Can it just be you?" I said just above a whisper, and he nodded his head with a reassuring smile.

"Of course doll," he replied, "when would you feel most comfortable doing it?"

"Now..." I stuttered, "but I have to be cuddled."

"I think that's a fair deal," he smiled, rolling onto his butt so I could sit on his lap.

"I'm one hundred perfect going to cry. You know that right?" I asked, and he nodded, "you owe me ice cream."

"Chocolate chip cookie dough?"

"Yes," I smiled, pausing as my smile left my face, "so what do you wanna know?"

"Who did experiments on you and what experiments were they?" He asked, and I clenched my jaw. His palm cupped my face as he stared into my eyes, "this is a safe space doll. You're okay. I promise."

"Sorry," I whispered as my eyes started to water, "I haven't even started yet and I'm already crying."

"Hey," he said softly, "That's okay, it's okay. I will wait until you're ready. But just try sweetheart."

"Brendan Thomas," I said as my voice broke, "did all of my experiments."

"Okay, good job doll," he smiled, "you're doing such a good job. Keep going. It's okay."

"He uh- he injected me with different serums," I whispered, and then my head started to throb, "I'm sorry- my heads starting to hurt give me a sec."

"Take your time baby," he said softly, wiping the tears that I didn't know that fell off of my cheeks with his thumb.

And then I started having flashbacks.

"Are you gonna be good?" Brendan asked, and I nodded my head with a terrified stare. He grabbed my wrist, dragging me through the halls toward the one room I never wanted to be in.

The torture in my cell was nothing compared to the torture of this room. Every memory I want to forget from this place is being in that room. He dragged my bloodied body through those huge black doors, chaining me to a metal chair as he rolled in a tray full of vials.

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