❤Duff #9- Die Trying

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Angst/Fluff

🎸

For the fifth time today, I was standing in front of the bathroom mirror bawling my eyes out.
I loathed the thought of myself. The way I looked, everything about it.
Even more, I hated that I looked this way in front of Duff.

Duff was perfect in every way. With his tall stature, blonde hair, and perfect face, I could never figure out why he wanted me. I was nothing special by any means. At all, but Duff always told me I was the most beautiful thing.

I didn't believe him. I couldn't.

********************
Duff

I dropped all of my stuff for the studio as soon as I closed the door to my apartment.
I groaned and rubbed my sore shoulders from holding my bass all day.

I called for June, but she never responded.
I furrowed my eyebrows at this considering she usually greets me as soon as I wall through the door.

As I looked throughout the first floor, there was no sign of her. Seeing as how she wasn't downstairs, I ventured upstairs where I was met with the sound as broken sobs.
I rushed over to the bathroom door and opened the door to see June, sobbing on the bathroom floor.

********************
June

I gasped as the bathroom door opened and Duff looked at me, a sadness in his eyes.
I reached for a towel to cover myself, letting out a bone-racking sob in the process.
I didn't want him to see me like this.

Duff calmly walked into the bathroom and sat down on the floor beside me before pulling me into his chest.
I sobbed as he held my head to his chest and gently ran his fingers through my hair.

"Shh Sweetheart. You're alright."
He whispered calmly into my ear.

When I was calm enough to speak and my sons had died down, Duff asked the question I didn't want to answer.

"Sweetheart. I don't want to upset you again, but you gotta tell me what's wrong. Can you tell me?"
He asked sweetly, looking into my eyes.

"I hate myself."
I said truthfully, looking down as tears brimmed my eyes again.

I expected Duff to tell me all of these things that I knew I wouldn't believe. But he didn't.

"Stand up."
He said.

I looked at him puzzled before complying. He grabbed my shoulders before attempting to make me look into the mirror.
When I resisted, he spoke firmly.

"June McKagen, look in the mirror."
He used his last name in place of mine when he was either upset or very happy. In this case, he was upset.
I turned to look in the mirror and Duff stood behind me.

"Tell me every little thing you hate June. Every little flaw you loathe."

I didn't know where to begin. So I started at the top of my body and worked my way down.

"My hair's frizzy and I can't ever get it to look right. My face is nothing special. My boobs are too small. My stomach pudges out too much. My thighs are huge and have stretch marks all over them."
I named as many things as I could think of, relinquishing all of my inner thoughts to him.

When I was done talking, my eyes were glassed over with unshed tears.
Then he spoke.

"You see things so wrong June. Let me show you what I see. Your hair-"
His hand gently ran through my brown locks.
"- is so soft. I could run my hands through it all fuckin' day if I could. You face, Jesus, where do I start? Love the way you look without make-up on. The way your eyes light up over the simplest things. How you blush every time I call you baby. The way your lips curve into a smile before I kiss ya."
His hands made their way down to cup my boobs, gently caressing them over the towel I had grabbed.
"These. Baby, they're perfect. You may not have double or triple D's, and that's okay. Because they're perfect for me. Love how they're so perky and soft in my hands all the time. Your stomach-"
His hands gently rubbed my stomach, this time under the towel.
"- you may think is too much, but I love it. Y'know why? Because one day, our baby will be there. You'll have our baby in your stomach for nine months. Be the perfect Mom."
His hands moved to caress both of my thighs.
"Your thighs, Sweetheart, are one of my favorite parts of you. Make the perfect pillow for when you want to play with my hair. Love the way you wrap them around me when we cuddle. I love the way they jiggle when you walk. I love the stretch marks on them, baby. Could trace and kiss each and everyone."

Duff turned me around to look at him and smiled kindly down at me.
"You. Sweetheart. Are. Perfect."
He said softly, kissing my lips in between each word.

"You mean those things, Duff?"
I asked, on the verge of his tears from his words.

"Every fucking word baby. Breaks my heart that you see yourself any other way but right."

"I'm sorry Duff. Sometimes, it's really hard to see me the way you claim to see me."
I said looking down at the floor.

"Hey, hey, none of that."
He lifted my chin with his fingers.
"I will make sure that you see yourself for the way you truly are. You're so beautiful, Sweetheart. Inside and out. And I'll be damned if you don't believe me. So I'll try, every day baby, to make you see what I see. Or dammit, I'll die trying."

"I love you, Duff. So much."

"I love you too Sweetheart. So much."
He said before gently bringing his lips to mine.


So I was really feeling this one. Sorry for any mistakes, I wrote this on my phone and it was kinda flowed. I edited the best I could.

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