Lie To Yourself

13

I've hardly slept at all. I looked at the clock and it was 5:30am. I wasn't going to go back to sleep now. I turned on the television and curled myself around a pillow. I wasn't really watching it but I just didn't want to be alone. I didn't want to feel like I was here to deal with this feeling on my own.

After 20 minutes I started to feel restless, was Brooke still in bed with that girl. Did I want to see her? No.

Plain and simple. No. I feel ashamed for what I've done and the things I have thought.

I need to get ready for work, I'll leave Brooke a note telling her I have to leave early for a meeting, she won't know there's anything wrong. It's not her fault I feel like this, I'm just a bit confused and want to be on my own-but I don't at the same time. Fuck sake Katie pull yourself together and stop being dramatic.

I was at the office by 6:45 and the only other car at the office was Tim's. Of course it was. A little secret, if he's this early, his wife is annoyed with him, he hides it well but I've known him too long and heard him on the phone too many times to see pass the facade.

"Morning Tim, I'm just going to sort some stuff out for todays meetings" I perked up so he'd not ask.

"Oh hey, is Brooke with you?" He's noticed, fuck.

"Oh no, she said she'd rather get the bus this morning" oh brilliant Katie are we lying to other people as-well as yourself now.

"Ah fair enough, we'll I won't be here all day. I've got a lunch meeting that will probably last all day so I've just got some stuff to do, thanks for those proposals last night. The customers should be getting back to us this week"

"You're welcome, no worries. I'll put your phone on DND after 12pm" I smiled at him as I started to walk away.

As I got to the office I wondered how I'd make it through the day. Not only seeing Brooke, but also the sheer exhaustion!

Around 9am people started turning up at the office and I noticed Brooke on the security camera so I really quickly closed my office door!

Luckily for me, her training room is on the first floor and I'm based on the 3rd but I didn't want to risk her coming to check on me.

12pm and 120 emails later I was shattered...I might have to order myself some food in to just keep me awake!

I was sat on my desk, my legs were parted slightly, Brooke walked towards me, her eyes on my eyes. As she got towards my body she held my face, tilting my head and kissing my neck. She ran her hand up my thigh under my dress. She reached my knickers and started to rub slightly.

"Fuck Brooke" I breathed into her.

"Katie, Katie, KATIE"

Shit. Fuck. Shit. Hell.

A knocking on my door was becoming more and more in person. I was brought back into the now.

"Coming!" I said walking towards my office door.

Standing there with a worried look on her face was the woman herself.