Until I Met You (Age regression)

13 -Embarrassed- EDITED

I'm just laying there, on my bed, when it all comes back to me.

The roof, the bathroom, FaceTime. Every single time, I've made a complete fool of myself and been completely oblivious to it.

Suddenly, my phone starts ringing, a random song that I used to like playing, but I ignore it, letting it ring out. Part of me knows that I should've just answered, I didn't even know if it was Damon or not.

I'm embarrassed of myself, the way that I so easily submitted to him. The glint in his eyes shone of power, it was even worse that he knew what kind of leverage he had over me. It felt like i didn't have power over my actions when I was with him. Every single time I've seen him, without fail, I've made an embarrassment of myself.

I don't like the false sense of security that I feel when I'm with him, I don't like how I feel so incredibly happy when I'm with him. I hate the way he makes me feel.

I curl into myself, tears blooming in the corner of my eyes.

I just want to be able to wallow in sadness.

My body is cold, shivers racking down my spine, I only have on shorts and a large T-shirt, it's plain, not something I'd like to wear,  not something that Livi would like to wear. I want to be beautiful like her, I want to be able to wear a skirt without being stared at like I'm weird. I want to be able to wear a T-shirt outside again without the long white scars on my arms sticking out like a sore thumb. I wish things were different. I wish I were different.

My phone rings again, but this time I look, his name is on the screen. I just let it ring out, not caring enough to decline it. Or rather, I don't have the heart to decline it, its less direct this way, I'm not exactly defying him. Once it stops ringing it starts again. It doesn't stop, the sound soon becomes daunting, echoing through my ears. Soon enough, along with the calls, a text messages start coming through.

Damon ❤️: Are you okay? Read

Damon ❤️: Sweetheart?  Read

Damon ❤️: Why aren't you answering, Love? Read

Damon ❤️: What happened? Read

Damon ❤️: Gorgeous, if you don't answer, which I know you can because you're reading my messages, I'll be happy to come over there. I think Olivia and your father would love to see me. Sent 2:13 PM

My eyes widen, almost comically, as I see that the time is 2:39. Until now, I hadn't realised that the calls had stopped coming, along with the texts. I had no doubt in my mind that he was coming.

Shit. He was coming.

Simultaneously, I heard Livi call my name from the steps, her voice echoing through the halls. Quickly, I got up from my bed. I know that he would come upstairs if I gave him the chance.

My feet padded down the endless corridors and finally the grand staircase, my sister's voice coming clearer with each step, along with Damon's deep and husky one.

I brought my hands together in front of me, my gaze downcast, honestly, I was terribly afraid of what was going to happen.

Part of me was fantasizing that he'd take me over his knee, another wanted him to just take me in his arms and hug me til I forgot who I was, forget what trauma I have.

It was embarrassing, even now I want him.

Now at the doorway, I stuck my head out just a little bit so that I could see him and my sister. After staring for a few seconds he seemed to realise I was there, his head turning in my direction. His face was set in stone, expression blank. Livi just walked away, seeming to realize that it was her time to leave.