3 A. M. Writer- 𝚁𝚎𝚊𝚍 𝚊𝚝 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚘𝚠𝚗 𝚙𝚎𝚛𝚒𝚕

"I got a 47 on my Trig test last time! I'm a freaking super genius over here!"

My mood at the moment could perfectly be understood if you listened to the "Lost in Paradise" outro of Jujustu Kaisen after watching episode 12. Majorly confused, perhaps in tears (if you're that kind of anime watcher), and full of vengeance. You may want to punch a blue haired someone or something in the face while a jazzy saxophone plays the same contradictory song as it has for the past season. To put it in more simple words, rage.

What's absolutely genius about this outro is that it is so opposite to the actual content in the show that it shocks you into realizing the episode is over. It leaves you on a cliffhanger or emotional moment, only to drop you into a beach vacation where the main characters and their teacher are dancing and buying sunglasses. I mean, what is that? It hurts man; it hurts to see your favorite character about to murder a freak or something else strange and then get suddenly shipped to Honolulu.

I was feeling this bottled up rage because of my inability to finish my math quiz. I was sitting there, hands over my head, curled up over my paper like I thought someone might be cheating, and being mentally tortured. I really wanted to cry, but I never ended up doing it. I should've. I might have gotten out of doing the quiz. So, let's set the scene. A boring geometry classroom. It's too dim so you're going to fall asleep when the teacher decides to use the giant tv at the front of the room. Otherwise, it's too bright and cold. It's always too cold. The quiz is five questions long, with multiple blanks for each one. There were twenty five minutes to do the quiz but guess what... There's five minutes left now and you've only filled out the first question all the way.

Yeah. No, I get what you might be thinking. Is this test anxiety? At the time, I didn't know. It could've been this thing where you're able to do math, but because you find writing and languages so easy your brain shuts down and doesn't do the math you actually do know how to do when you need it to. I was trying to get myself tested for both things, but unfortunately the only time they could see me was, like, after school lets out for summer so I still had to struggle through. My aunt Emmie had the same thing when she was in high school, so it's likely that I got it cuz of genetics.

I never finished the quiz. I had labeled all of the models, began each question, but I couldn't get an answer for any of them. I walked out of the classroom with kids all around me saying how easy it was. It sucked so hard to feel like the only one struggling. I know I couldn't be the only one though, right? It was partially my fault for being in such a bad class though. I signed up for advanced geometry while having only done half of algebra one. That's a complicated story on its own. I shouldn't have been admitted into the advanced class anyway, since I didn't have the completion credit, but that stuff isn't interesting.

It wouldn't have sucked so much if there wasn't a board at the front of the classroom for kids who got 100 on tests directly in front of my desk. It burned into my skull while I sat there like the Eye of Sauron.

So you know the name of the chapter is a quote, right? It's from Haikyuu!! (a show about some high schoolers who play volleyball) Well the boy who said it got a higher grade than I did. I got a 30, and that was with my teacher cutting me some slack for writing notes on the diagrams about what I did know about the question.

You know, it's slightly funny (though not really), that my friend Will calls me slightly censored kacchan. (I'm really sorry for all the anime references but it's a part of my daily life!!) Apparently my stress transforms into anger, but it's never directed toward one person or subject. (or is it victim?) I guess it says something when I can tell that I kin Bakugou or Edward Elric. Short, angry, and good hair. (except I'm not blonde)