[TAC] THREE'S A CROWD

Chapter 18*

Stop being mad na, ok? As much as I enjoy reading the comments and pieces of your thoughts, don't get angry. Hahha. I only want good vibes, and you've been asking for OffTayNew, so here it is. Hahaha. I didn't expect these kind of reception, and actually I quite get excited with you being so pissed at them. I love you.

So, here's your request. Tay's POV. ❤

***

{Tay}

Tay tries to will his eyes to shut as he remains curled up against the armrest of the couch. His eyes, for some reason, have a mind of their own, and refuse to shut, even though it's 12 am, and now officially Christmas. He blinks at the television that is suddenly far too bright, but his eyes don't stay closed. He just wants sleep. He refuses to accept that it's Christmas until he goes to bed and wakes up in the morning.

He accidentally shifts a little, forgetting that Janhae's head is rested on his shoulder as she sleeps the night away, snoring faintly. Tay makes a mental note to tease her about that in the morning.

He tries not to gag as he looks down at himself and remembers he and Janhae are wearing matching holiday sweaters with Christmas trees in the center of them. His mom had thought it was a good idea, and they had never been ones to criticize anything their own mother had spent her money on, so they threw it on and smiled like it was the best Christmas' Eve presents they'd ever gotten.

He does his best not to move his body as he strains his neck to see if his mom is still sleeping on the other end of the couch. He lets out an exhausted sigh and lets his head rest back against the couch, wishing he could just sleep peacefully like the both of them. Santa can't even sneak his way in with how awake and alert Tay is.

His narrowed eyes focus back on the television, because he thinks that maybe if he watches whatever Christmas special is on that he's probably watched a billion times before, he might get tired more quickly and thus, fall asleep.

He snorts and moves to rest his head against his fist when he realizes he's now watching How The Grinch Stole Christmas, which, although he's watched many times, he doesn't think he can get bored with because of how much he adores the special.

A tiny grin pokes as he watches the opening scene, but quickly, whatever enthusiasm he has for the movie is vanished into thin air. And for a pretty pathetic reason, he might add.

Lately, the weirdest, most absurd things have started to remind him of New.

At first it was nothing but a normal, natural feeling of missing someone he loves, always having him in the back of his mind, wondering what he's doing---basic breakup stuff. Now it's like Tay's longing for the boy is starting to spiral out of control. He'll try to stop himself from thinking about him, because he's pretty sure it's doing nothing for his mental health, but he can't, and it's getting worse.

Just the other day, the sound of a bird chirping in the distance reminded him of New, and after he glanced up at where it was hidden in the trees, he found himself biting back tears, and he didn't even know why. He later cleared his mind enough to come to the conclusion that it was because when he looked up, the bird was tiny and delicate, and its little chirps were high-pitched and a bit squeaky. Kind of like New's voice. Especially when he's gripping Tay's biceps, on the brink of---

Tay shakes his head and turns his face into his fist, willing his mind to rid itself of the visual. It's only making things harder, thinking about the heavenly things they used to do together that will never happen again, and it's all his fault.

But back to the subject at hand. Tay feels more pathetic than ever, because the Grinch's green color only reminds Tay that green is a mixture of the colors yellow and blue, and blue, well...that's his personal favorite color, because they also happen to the be the favorite color of the love of his life.