Leavitt Stafford and the Awful, Terrible, Not Very Nice Plan.

Chapter the Fourth: Jonathan Oscar Stafford

Jonathan Oscar Stafford was a polite gentleman who possessed extraordinary compassion for the less fortunate in society. Though he was rather bashful, he would always show kindness towards those with whom he conversed, regardless of if they treated him with warmth or scorn, and he would display selflessness far beyond that of the average God-fearing citizen. As a result of his benevolent nature, it is surely no surprise that many people possessed a certain fondness of him. However, some would exploit his altruism, and so he would frequently feel dreadfully harried. This was a dreadful shame, for he possessed the purest soul and was undeserving of such nonsense!

John had inherited his benevolent nature from his father, Henry William Stafford. Henry was regarded by many as a saint, and for excellent reason, for though he was a gentleman of wealth, he would make use of his wealth for charitable purposes. With the aid of his immense wealth, he would provide the penurious with their own living quarters, and he would often deliver sustenance to them so that they would not starve. He possessed the belief that, with the assistance of other men of immense wealth such as himself, the destitute could all be provided with salvation, and he would work tirelessly towards this vision. Towards the prosperous who did not wish to share their fortunes with those who needed them the very most, he would declare, "Treasures gained by wickedness do not profit, but righteousness delivers from death." Unfortunately, though also unsurprisingly, the greedy men did not wish to share their wealth, and so the poor would continue to waste away upon the rat-infested streets as they prayed for an afterlife which did not, unlike the mortal realm, feel as though it resided within the inferno of Dante.

John had not known his father particularly well, for he had passed away when he was a mere child of three years, although his mother, who doted on him, would explain how wonderful the late Mr. Stafford had been, and he thus decided that he would continue the work of his father. His mother, pride blooming within her bosom at how beneficent her son was, declared that, once he grew older, she would provide him with the funds which her late husband had passed onto her so that he could indeed continue the charitable duties of his father. And as you, the reader, can see, she remained true to her word.

It must be said, however, that his mother did not possess this level of pride with regards to John's elder brother. As a matter of fact, she would tell him how she wished he had never been born! A truly dreadful woman, I must state.

Today, we shall observe the duties of John, for the development of his narrative shall prove to be of utmost importance to the story as a whole, and for it shall be most riveting to the audience for whom this tome is intended. It is my wish for you to grow fond of this character, for the arc which I bring forth to you shall be even more captivating!

John descended from his gig alongside the three men whom he had employed to assist him: Eberhard, Bert, and Clarence. Eberhard was a burly man with a silent nature and a countenance which revealed no emotion, though he possessed a tender heart. This was particularly evident when he cast his eyes upon the suffering of the penurious, which he could not bear to witness, and so he would use his strength to carry crates of sustenance towards them so that they may be freed from the cold fingers of starvation. Bert was spindle-shanked and could often be observed with a cloud of tobacco smoke cloaking his head so that he appeared as though he were an apparition, which was as his personality appeared, for he was so quiet that one may think that he could be a ghost after all. He also possessed a grating cough which simply would not disappear, which he believed must have arisen due to miasma. This was indeed somewhat correct, but it was not the sort of miasma he suspected. And lastly, Clarence was a handsome Scottish man with flaming red hair who would speak endlessly about any nonsense which would enter his head, and who simply could not sit still. Many also suspected Clarence to be a homosexual, though they possessed no evidence of this. All three of the men towered over John, who was dreadfully aware of his short stature.