They've Returned

Not Stupid

The Empire State Building was full of CountryHumans again. Russia had never been so happy to see everyone. The meeting started off as usual with roll call and important news. Then, Russia began to discuss the No-Man situation.

"I was his first target. A taser was used to take me out. He threw me out a window and I needed a lot of medical care. During that time, Italy was attacked by No-Man. This time, he used a revolver. He was also shorter, not even coming up to China's chin, as I would say. Then there was a big break, but another attack occured. This time, it was aimed at Japan. The first attempt was with a samurai sword, or a katana, or whatever you call it. The attempt was sabotaged but No-Man had a Plan B up his sleeve. He threw one of those throwing stars at America, intending for it to hit him. He dodged it, but it hit Japan instead. She needed medical attention and a few weeks of therapy. But now, we're all fine, though the mystery of No-Man and his attacks are still unsolved."

"Thank you, Russia, for that marvelous introduction," said a voice behind the crowd. Everyone turned and gasped. No-Man, dressed in his black attire, stood behind the crowd. Everyone panicked and and ran to the front of the room, trying to get as far away from him as they could.

Russia scowled and ran towards No-Man, about to ram him into the wall before he disappeared into a wisp of smoke. Russia ran headlong into the wall. He stood again, and heard No-Man behind him.

"I like your style, young man," he said. "But you're a little unplanned."

Russia swung his arm at No-Man. He stepped swiftly to the side. He swung again, No-Man stepping away again and swung his arm at Russia. Russia was knocked to the ground. He looked up at No-Man.

"What do you want? What is your reason for attacking me and my friends, both physically and mentally?" he asked.

"That, I am not going to answer," No-Man replied.

"Just... why? Why'd you do it? Why did you do all of this? Every action has a reason, so what's your reason?"

"These sound like words from an adult."

"That's because I am an adult."

"No, you are not. You act like an adult. You have adult feelings. You say adult-like things. But deep down in that scares, cowardly little heart of yours, you're still a child. A scared, cowardly child with no knowledge of the real world. You have always been a child and you will always be a child."

"I am not a child, and I am not a coward."

"I know how a child acts, and you are acting like one."

"How would you know what a child acts like? Spying on preschoolers at recess?"

"I had two boys. Believe me, they both tried to act brave, but they were both cowards."

"Why would you say something like that? No good father in his right mind would ever say anything like that about his children."

"My boys did not want to continue my family's legacy. They were both cowards and stupid. Very stupid children."

"Who are they?"

"You already know them. Of course, one has been gone for years, all because a stupid wall came down. Why it was built, I don't know. But it kept them from seeing each other for about twenty years. Eventually, they got together again. I believe one of them is in this room right now, and I hope he can heal every word I say."

"You sound like my mother. She was only person I know who would legitimately call her children cowardly, scared, and stupid."

"I knew your mother. She was a lot like you. Arrogant, full of herself, stupid. She was willing for anything as long as it meant power."

"My mother was not stupid!"

"Yes she was. She signed that pact in 1939 just so she could control half of Poland. That was a she wanted: power and land. She didn't even bother to care for her children."

"My. Mother. Was. Not. STUPID!"

Russia leapt from the floor and tackled No-Man. He repeatedly hit him in the face and kicked him several t times. Then, Russia lifted him by the scruff of his disguise and held his face close to No-Man's.

"Yes, my mother was a terrible person," he growled, "But she loved me at the end. And no one will talk about her like you did!"

No-Man, struggling with Russia's grip, chuckled. "This isn't very comfortable. I'm afraid I'm going to have to call my friends."

He snapped his fingers, and three wisps of smoke appeared behind him. Russia's eyes widened and he dropped No-Man.

There were three figures, all dressed in the same black bodysuits. One was extremely tall, the other two much shorter. The tall one held a taser in his hand. One short one had a revolver, the other wielded a katana.

No-Man wasn't one person. He was four.